Weird dreams.

So far this week, I've dreamed that I was just hanging out with Diane Keeton. You know, we were buddies. And she was utterly delightful and fun. And GORGEOUS.

I also dreamed that I ran over my ex-husband with my car. There was this split second in the dream where I had the opportunity to make the decision whether or not to run him down, and I chose to go for it. And I just kept going. Never looked back.

Last night I dreamed that my boss was having me sign some bonus paperwork that said I was getting a $100,000 bonus (with a $42,000 addition for "exceptional work"). I asked him if the figure was correct, and he was like, "Of course it is!" I was literally breathless and speechless in my dream. It was almost an anxiety attack, but in a good way.

So that makes Elmo wonder (those of you with 2 to 4 year olds know where I'm coming from): What IF I got a $142,000 bonus (which after taxes, would be reduced by about 30%, but let's just pretend the IRS didn't exist for a minute), what would I do?

In no specific order:
Pay off my car.
Pay off my MasterCard.
Pay off the smaller of my 2 home loans.
Put a healthy amount in The Geej's college account.
Put a healthy amount in my goddaughter's savings account.
Pay my mom back for some stuff.
Put a healthy amount in my ROTH IRA.
Put a healthy amount in my money market account.
Get some landscaping done, front and back.
Replace my back fence.
Install a sprinkler system (front only).
Finish putting gutters all around the house.
Get new carpet throughout.
Redo the kitchen countertops; get new appliances; re-paint; new kitchen floors.
New big girl bed for The Geej.
New desk for the office/guest room.
New tubs in both bathrooms.
Move Mr. Wonderful down here tomorrow.
Give a substantial donation to the baby home in Vladivostok where The Geej once lived.
Hire an every-other-week maid service.
Get someone to clean out my garage/storage building and sell all that shit on Craig's list or whatever.
Go to Vegas to see Prince.
Contribute more significantly to a couple of charities/NFPs that I already give regular donations to.