Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Today is the anniversary of my cousin's toddler son dying of cancer.
One of my good friends is burying his father--who just died of cancer--today.
My uncle is fighting like hell against an aggressive type of cancer that has attacked (among other things) his spine, upon which he endured a 10 hr. surgery at M.D. Anderson yesterday.
And Saturday will be the seven year anniversary of my father losing his battle with stomach cancer.
What the FUCK, y'all? Who out there reading this hasn't been touched in some way--either personally or through a friend or family member--by this horrible, HORRIBLE disease. It just infuriates me--and breaks my heart--to think about it.
This holiday season, be thankful for every healthy day you have and don't ever, ever take that health for granted.
Wednesday, December 02, 2009
Dear Santa Claus,
For Christmas I would like:
- A Barbie house with three Barbies and kids and stuff in it—a couch, and a potty and a sink, and a bed for a mom and kids, a backyard, a balcony, and a baby room
- A bell for my bike
- Some real gum—a whole stack of it in all different flavors
- My own real iPod with Hannah Montana music on it and night-night music you can put on there · Earphones for my iPod
- A little thing that you can strap on to a table so that my babydoll can sit in it and eat dinner
- I would also like my own bakery (Real)
- A movie called “PowerPuff Girls and Christmas”
- A whole new earring box with new earrings in it
- A get-ready thing with everything in it that my mommy uses to get ready
- Stuff to make my room and bathroom smell good (spray)
- My own real computer like my mom’s
- A t.v. in my room to watch
- An ambulance with a hospital and a fire truck that I can play with with my toys (I already have a police car, so you don’t have to get me one). I want stuff that goes in them like a nurse, a doctor, and a little wheelchair that you can push people in that has wheels.
- A school house with a bell
- A 100-piece puzzle because I already know all of mine
- A doctor and nurse for cats and little cats that can fit in there and a place that it waits with its mom
- A mop to mop stuff
- A pretend hamster wheel for my pretend hamster and a little bed and it has its own comb and spray and its own little bath and its own cage and a little thing that they drink some water
- A pretend playground like my plaground at school for my Little People to play on
And for Dah: I want something purple that when you walk in it makes her smell and it smells super good everywhere and a purple candle
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
One is not BORN a megalomaniac. Instead, one BECOMES a megalomaniac when he a) assumes he is 100% right 100% of the time, b) thinks that his way is the one and true way, c) refuses to listen to dissent and assumes peope are idiots when they actually question his way, and d) think that he is doing people a favor--nay, saving them--by sharing all of his wisdom.
Feel free to discuss. And to disagree with me. Because you see I am NOT a megalomaniac, and can therefore endure and respond to dissenting opinons.
Feel free to adorn any stair rails you might have in YOUR house with multi-colored, sparkly pipe cleaners if you'd like. As you can see, it adds class and a splash of color, just in time for the holidays.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Last bit, add some freshly shaved Parmesean.
And you're done*.
Serve (or eat) right away or the leaves will get wilty.
*House Pizzeria puts dried, crumbled salami on it if you order off the menu. But I don't eat salami, so this is the only way I've ever had it. It's the simplicity that makes it so amazing.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Geej: What's a prune?
BH: It's a dried plum, and it will give you a diarrhea.
Geej: What's diarrhea.
BH: I'll draw you a picture.
Immediately after this conversation, she went back to signing, "I wanna rock and roll all night, and party ev-uh-ree day" in the bathtub and he went back to watching soccer on t.v. like this was the most normal conversation in the world.
The two of them kill me.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
I promise I'll write about the highlights and post photos and whatnot sometime this week. But right now, I'm seated outside at Opal Divine's on W. Sixth, having a Maker's on the rocks and waiting for Thelma to join me prior to walking over to La Zona Rosa to see The Tragically Hip.
I've been in a FUNKY mood since we got back. I guess it was just flaming re-entry back into real life (mail including bills! laundry! the grocery store! twice!) after spending so many days with no schedules and no real "duties". I will say that I was way happy to see The Geej. Of course she'd grown 7 feet in the 6 days since I'd seen her. Like a weed, that one.
It's gorgeous outside right now. I've never been to Opal's all alone, and it's a bit of a weird feeling. Happily I've got my laptop and several mosquitoes to keep me company.
Oh wait, I think I just spotted a table of obnoxious Canadian Tragically Hip fans. They were just talking about The Maple Leafs and high-fiving, so... I'm not surprised. This is the way it goes with Hip shows: there are always a bunch of Canadian expats (or tourists) who come to the shows here because in Canada, The Tragically Hip sells out stadiums, so getting to see them in a small venue--for these super fans--is pretty fookin' awesome, ay? The thing that pisses me off is that they always just get so into the "HEY LOOK AT ME!! I'm CANADIAN...JUST LIKE YOU GUYS IN THE BAND!!! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!" There are always several douchebags sporting Maple Leaf hockey jerseys and drinking Molsens at the show, you know, just to drive the point home. I've been going to see this band for 20 years, and it just comes with the territory. But I will put up with it and I will have a great time because DAMN I love these guys. I have no idea why they haven't hit superstardom in the U.S., but it's fine with me b/c it allows me to see them play in little venues and experience the wonder that is Gordon Downie up close and personal-like. I am a superfan as well, let me assure you. I'm just a little less spaztastic about it. I hope.
So my sammich and fries are here, and I'm going to sign off so I can mack down on this shiz. I will finish up my anniversary-trip-posting tomorrow. But for now, here's some good, old Tragically Hip for you, from one of my favorite albums.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
We started out yesterday by leaving Austin and flying to my old stomping grounds of Birmingham, Alabama. Yes, I accidentally planned our trip to take place during the Texas/O.U. football game, but luckily I had asked rabid Longhorn Fan Lee to text me at the end of every quarter with the score, and he politely obliged. And we also managed to watch the latter half of the 2nd quarter at the sports bar in the Nashville airport. Luckily, by the time we landed in Alabama, Texas had won it. Barely.
We got our rent car and then turned around and returned it almost immediately because before we'd even left the airport, the "check engine" light was coming on. So after we'd switched from a Toyota Matrix (yay!) to a red Dodge Avenger (boo!), we headed into town and checked into our hotel.
It was cloudy, cool and breezy. After we got checked in, I drove BH and I around, checking out my old city. I was amazed by how melacholy the whole thing made me. I only lived there for a few years, but I really, really loved Birmingham. It's a surprising jewel of a city--sort of like Austin, believe it or not--and this time of year is simply spectacular there. The leaves haven't started to change yet because of the unusual amount of rain they got late this summer, but they're right on the cusp.
Saturday evening, we hooked up with a friend of mine from my days working at Southern Progress. We had drinks and dinner and lots of good conversation.
This morning, we woke up to glorious blue skies and crisp fall temperatures. We drove through my old Southside neighborhood (beautiful!), visited Vulcan Park, of course went here, and then went and hooked up in Crestline with another old friend of mine (who I hadn't seen in ten years) and her husband for brunch. After chowing down and catching up, I drove BH through the winding, hilly streets of Mountain Brook to look at the amazing homes. Finally we visited the Birmingham Civil Rights Institute before leaving town. It is a powerful and humbling reminder of how fragile and important human rights can be. I highly recommend it.
Wednesday, October 07, 2009
Saturday, October 03, 2009
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Fast forward a few weeks. Me, BH and his youngest son were headed downtown for some Mexican food early on a Saturday evening. As we sat at the light at 5th/Congress, guess who casually peddaled by, right in front of us with a HUGE smile on his face. You got it: Thongie McCycler. Next to our car was a big ol' pick-em-up truck with a couple of big ol' fellers in the cab. They were both pissing themselves laughing, and one had his camera out trying to hurriedly snap a photo of Billy Buttfloss. Their windows were down, so I lowered mine and inquired, "Did you get a good one?" And the guy with the camera--through HARDY laughter--said, "I'm from Minnesota and I've never been to Texas, and I did NOT expect to see anything like that." Yeah well, who DOES really?
Other friends reported sightings of the smiling self-propelled naturalist every now and again, but until this afternoon, I hadn't seen him again. But today, while sitting in HORRIBLE southbound traffic on Lamar, I saw him coming down the sidewalk and had just enough time to grab my Flipcam out of my purse and record this--4 seconds of pure gold.
Leslie? You're SO 2001. THIS guy is the new freak about town.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
All I'm hoping is that I somehow make it through the rest of this year without having to be checked into Shoal Creek.
Like any great trainwreck, I recommend you watch this space for further developments.
Monday, September 28, 2009
- WEIGHT GAIN! Been going to the gym regularly since February, and haven't shed a pound. In fact, I've GAINED 5 lbs., so WTF?!
- INSOMNIA!! I'm not sleeping for shit. I tend to fall asleep, no problemo, but then I wake up--ZING!--at about 2:30am and can't get back to sleep. This happens at least three times a week, which leads me to my next issue...
- FATIGUE! Like utter exhaustion type fatigue. And not just physically, mentally as well.
- IRRATIONAL ANGER AND FRUSTRATION! You know how sometimes people describe their tempers as having "a short fuse"? Well, I'd describe mine these days as having NO fuse. At all. And I don't even want to describe how this lovely issue manifests itself in my day-to-day because it ain't purty.
- INSANELY DRY/ASHY SKIN AND HAIR LOSS! I don't think I need to really go into detail about this.
- HIGHLY IRRITABLE DIGESTIVE SYSTEM! Again, no details about this one. You're welcome.
- AND THE CRYING!! That's right: I'll just be sitting at my desk at work, and all of the sudden, I've got tears streaming down my face. Reason? You tell me and we'll both know.
Appealing, no?If I hadn't already had all my girly parts yanked a couple of years ago, I would suspect I was beginning the fun process of going through The Change. But I've been there and done that. Twice. (Long story.) So I'm suspecting it's my meds that I'm on--the hormones, the antidepressant/anti-anxiety meds, and the high blood pressure meds. All I know is I don't feel like Karla May, and I haven't in a month of Sundays. In fact, I've felt like I've been teetering on the edge of some kind of major implosion for a while now. And it's not because I'm unhappy. I'm pretty damn happy, actually. Things are great at home and getting better at work (after a fairly rough year). So what the HELL is up, people?! Anyone have any theories?
Monday, September 21, 2009
Monday, September 14, 2009
And finally, before leaving town, we braved the after-church crowds to eat lunch at the local diner that specializes in good old home cookin' and features menus made of Xeroxed sheets of paper glued on to grocery bags.
All in all, a very nice way to spend a Sunday.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Tuesday, September 08, 2009
- Today is "Presidential Indoctrination of The Youth of America" day. I expect to see all of the tween and teens who witnessed today's indoctrination (what with its subliminal messages and hardcore "Socialism will clear up your acne and get you dates!" theme) roaming the streets, zombielike and drooling, while demanding government funded abortions and a seat on Meemaw's upcoming death panel. You've been warned, America!
- Seriously, people are ridiculous.
- I think the main thing a lot of people were afraid of (but would never admit to) about this whole thing is that their children would be asked to sit down and respectfully listen to a black man of authority.
- Again, completely absurd.
- I am ready for summer to end. Like now. So damn sick of it.
- I'm enjoying some new (at least to me) music I've recently downloaded: Lightning Dust, Yeasayer, Yo La Tengo's latest, The Clientele, and Carly Simon. Yes, I meant to type the words "Carly Simon."
- Shut up.
- I'm trying to get BH to decide on an anniversary trip--either to Tennessee to drive around the Smoky Mountains and see the leaves or to The Grand Canyon. I want to get something on the calendar!
- I am currently reading "The Reader." No, I haven't seen the movie. And normally, I don't like fiction too much. But this, I'm really enjoying.
- My kitties, Doug and Diane, are now a year old. But they still wrestle and play like kittens, which is equal parts adorable and annoying.
- I'm excited about the new fall TV season starting back up. Especially about a few new shows: Glee, Community, Bored to Death, and the resurrection of Curb Your Enthusiasm.
- I'm also excited because there's an Indian restaurant coming to my zipcode. Most of the decent Indian food is located north of the river, so it'll be nice to have some closer to home. (My stomach just growled when I typed those last two sentences, by the way.)
- I am getting sick of watching "My First Place" and "Property Virgins" on HGTV and seeing these couples in their late 20s/early 30s with downpayments of $100k in the bank and budgets of $400k or $900k looking for houses. It makes me want to vomit.
- Saw "500 Days of Summer" this past weekend. I liked it a lot, however they could've eased up on the super close ups of Zooey Daschenel's eyes. WE GET IT!! SHE HAS GORGEOUS BLUE EYES! AND HER "SIGNATURE COLOR" IS BLUE!! ENOUGH ALREADY!
- BH fixed some sort of water pressure regulator thing that's been broken since I moved in to my house and, as a result, we now have normal water pressure. Hooray!!
- Got my hair color taken down a notch--not quite as light blonde. It was just too drastically different from my roots and made my hair look dirty all the time. Now it's more natural.
- I have two new sites that I check every day in order to fill my life with the cute and the bizarre--Zooborns and People Of Walmart (which is currently down, probably because Walmart slapped them with some sort of cease and desist order or something stupid like that).
- Which reminds me: If you ever want to feel like a real supermodel, go to one of our nation's theme parks. When I went to Sea World last month, I felt positively waifish amid all of the seriously, terrifyingly obese men, women and children there. It was alarming, to say the least.
- And I'll leave you with a photo of Doug chillaxing:
Monday, August 31, 2009
This season's games are being played at Nelson Field in NE Austin, but next season, they'll be moving downtown to House Park.
The attendance was 2,611, so there was plenty of room to sit pretty much wherever you wanted to.
We were all treated to a beautiful sunset and cooler-than-it-has-been-in-a-long-time temperatures.
The Geej got an Aztex tattoo, and BH talked to her about what was going on on the field. She actually sort of got into it. But when her attention DID wane, they had a handy bouncy house set up in which to bounce yourself silly. They also had a place where you their corporate sponsor, AMD, had set up two back-to-back big screen TVs so kids could play a soccer video game in case, you know, real life just wasn't doing it for them.And for some reason that I'm still not quite clear about, the Aztex mascot is a chili pepper named, wait for it, Sgt. Pepper. Um, okay.
One thing I was VERY impressed by was this group of SUPERfans located in the southwest corner of the stadium. They had horns and drums and basically went freakin' NUTS for the entire length of the game. Very entertaining.
By the way, the Aztex won--for the first time in 2 months!!
We had a really good time. I recommend the Aztex games for a good dose of easily accessible, inexpensive, small-town fun. However, unless you eat hot dogs or like those "nachos" with the canned "cheese" poured on them, then you're going to need to make other plans for dinner.
We went to Magnolia.
The Aztex--who are ranked last in their league--will play their final game of this season next Monday (Labor Day). They'll be playing a team from Portland, OR--the best team in the league. It's going to be a blood bath, but it should be entertaining!!
Friday, August 28, 2009
Trying like Hell to keep the plants in our beds alive.