Saturday, March 31, 2007
Friday, March 30, 2007
- Nearly had a wreck that would have majorly fucked up the front end of my car and the entire driver's side of the other car. A new Lexus.
- Nearly backed over 2 pedestrians.
- Rediscovered how much I like Sebadoh/Lou Barlow.
- Started a new book.
- Thought I was re-setting my alarm when, in fact, I was fast forwarding the time on my clock by about 1/2 hour. Talk about freaking out when I finally woke up.
- Made stir fry with tofu. (The Geej only ate the tofu and the onions. She's CRAZY for onions.)
- Was 15 minutes late to a big meeting that had about 65 people in it and had to enter through the front of the room. Walk of shame...
- Ate some organic chocolate covered cherries and nearly died because they were so good.
- Got serious fashion tips from and spent way too much time obsessing about this woman: "Isn't it glamorous?"
- Had to sit through an 8 hour training at work. 6 hours of it were pretty good. The other 2, pretty awful.
- Had to sit through another 4-hour training at work about how to discipline people who work for me. Unfortunately, "Time Out" and spanking aren't really condoned in the workplace.
- Downloaded "Don't You Worry 'Bout a Thing" by Stevie Wonder. Great. Fucking. Song.
- Got sick and tired of the gloom and the clouds and the rain.
- Got paid.
- Paid my mortgage, car payment, phone bill and credit card bill.
- Managed to spend $95 in 20 minutes at Whole Foods. (I'm a shopping ninja in that place.)
- Had some really good pecan crusted sauteed catfish served over a mixed greens salad with grilled potatoes and a Cajun mustard sauce. SO good.
- Finally finished up a massive, 14-month, multi-faceted project at work.
- Sent Malcontent Mama's b-day card 4 days late.
- Didn't blog as much as I wanted to.
- Snuggled with The Geej every morning.
- Snuggled with Earl every night.
- Didn't get enough sleep.
- Meant to clean the kitchen floor and/or my bathroom every night. Never did.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
My dream last night featuring George Clooney.
Tabasco green jalapeno sauce. On everything.
The new candles that Old Navy is selling.
"Rough Thymes" body wash by Kiss My Face.
My Canon PowerShot SD900 Digital Elph. Roar.
David Byrne's March playlist
The Daily Puppy dot com
"Intervention" on A&E
The Intellectual Devotional
Bluebonnets going crazy.
Aqua Teen Hunger Force's upcoming movie
Old Texas dudes in straw cowboy hats driving beat up old trucks
The Geej's new obsession with dancing to songs she makes up
Getting loveletters in the mail
Bulk trash collection
Charles Burns's collected Black Hole in hardback
Chomp! vegan cookies
El Chile's hot sauce
My bad ass team at work
Having my taxes done already
The "Pretty in Pink" smoothie at Whole Foods
The restaurant near my house that has a sign out front saying, "Now Hiring Snowconers"
"The Sopranos" returning next month
My back-to-back math anxiety dreams this week
Getting credit card solicitations in the mail
The volume on my computer shorting out
How freakin' FILTHY my car is
The Geej's school being closed for 6 weeks this summer and having no back-up plan
Having kitten fever
My mortgage company and how stupid they are
The half-inch roots I'm currently sporting
Talking on your bluetooth headset while you're in the elevator with me. Grrr...
Gloomy, gloomy weather
Gas jumping by $0.11/gal. in a 24-hour period
Monday, March 26, 2007
Friday, March 23, 2007
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Long story short, I went with Jaye to a doctor's appointment, and as we were sitting there waiting (forever) for her doctor to come into the examination room, I discovered this little gem in the stack of totally horrible selections:
Country motherfucking Weekly, ya'll.
Could Kenny Chesney look anymore like a smug prick than he does on this cover? God, I want to punch him in the pookah shells.
So THIS is what Bush supporters and NASCAR fans read. Interesting.
Okay, here are the two main things I came away with after exploring the scary pages of this publication:
1.) They've clearly got one Hell of an ad rep. I mean, how well does this publication know its audience?
"Friends are the Highlights of Life" Precious Moments figurines? Are you fucking KIDDING ME?! Why didn't I find this ad BEFORE Christmas. Fuck.
"A Salute to Hee-Haw" DVD set. Available exclusively at Wal*Mart. Um... I must admit, "Hee Haw" was a regular part of my weekend variety show line-up when I was a wee one. My dad thought Junior Samples was a hoot, dug the "Hee Haw Honeys," and used to declare (with clock-like regularity) that Buck Owens was one of the "ugliest men God ever created." But I also was fed a steady diet of "The Carol Burnet Show," "Flip Wilson," "Sonny and Cher," "Tony Orlando and Dawn," etc. So it was sort of balanced out. But to OWN this? On DVD? So that you can relive the magic over and over and over and BR-549, and over, and over? I think not.
Be thankful that this image is blurry, because the clear reality of this item might cause you to go blind with pure tackiness. Yes friends, "Red Hot Betty is a Red Hat Lady!" And she's teaching fellow "Red Hatters" how to put a little "boop-oop-di-doop" into their stride, even if their stride involves a three-pronged cane or walker. She can be yours for only (I shit you not) $117!! Yep, this is how I want MY grandma spending her fixed income.
"Lovers United by Destiny and Doomed by American Genocide of Their People." How utterly romantic.
Weight loss ad for Thinstant.
2) If this guy is representative of a "rising country star," I'm pretty sure that it would be okay to burn Nashville to the ground.
Folks, I'd like to introduce you to Trent "Really. I've got hair under this ever-present doo-rag, just like Brett Michaels and Leif Garrett. I swear!" Tomlinson. Not only was he listed as #8 in the "Country's Hottest Bachelors" section (because he's wasted no time finding his way onto "Country Weekly's" list of "the hubba-hubba hottest"), there's also an in-depth article about this fuckchop tht features photos of him pensively strolling through a graveyard (with his doo-rag on, dontcha know) during the video shoot for his latest single, "One Wing in the Fire," which is apparently a major departure from his rockin' first release, "Drunker Than Me" off of his album Country is my Rock. I think I'm getting nauseous from the overwhelming smell of shit.
Okay, so yeah. There you have it. A glimpse into what happening in commercial country music, brought to us by the brilliant folks over at "Country Weekly" magazine (with help from their advertisers, of course).
Man, am I ever poised for some nightmares tonight.
Monday, March 19, 2007
Just the idea of those stodgy old justices having to utter the words "bong hits" in the hallowed halls of the Supreme Court makes me smile.
Friday, March 16, 2007
So on the rare occasion when I actually get to cook for myself, I just get freakishly giddy. At about 5:45 today I realized, "Holy crap! I'm home alone tonight, and I can eat whatever I want!!" So I went to Whole Foods without a list and just decided to see what sounded good and ended up in my little basket.
I left with a lovely wild caught yellowfin tuna steak, some fresh asparagus, a red onion, grape tomatoes, a ginger/scallion marinade for the fish, shitake risotto, lemon goat cheese, a bottle of really nice Savignon Blanc and a slice of key lime pie.
When I got home, I rubbed both sides of the tuna steak with some course sea salt and multi-colored peppercorns, then put the marinade on it and stuck it in the fridge for an hour.
I prepped the rest of the stuff, and when it was time, started steaming the asparagus in my asparagus steamer (yes, I have a piece of cookware specifically for asparagus. So what?!), and preparing the risotto. I also started to make a "garnish" for the asparagus: grape tomatoes (halved), diced red onion, capers, chunked goat cheese, a bit of dijon mustard, white wine vinegar, olive oil, and lemon juice, salt and pepper. I mixed all this up and let it set in the fridge.
When it came time to cook the fish, I seared it on each side for about 2 minutes. I plated it with the risotto, asparagus and garnish and,
I'm not Jaye, but I tried.
The marinade was excellent: Made by "Wild Thymes," it's called Korean Ginger and Shallot. VERY flavorful. I should have gone a bit easier on the salt and pepper rub, and left the fish on the skillet for about 30 more seconds, each side. It was an exquisite cut of fish though, so I'm not complaining. (And hell, it should've been exquisite for freakin' $21.99/lb.)But all in all, it was very good. The random "garnish" I made for the asparagus added a perfect tangy, strong punch to their rather mellow spring flavor. And the lemon goat cheese added a lovely creamy consistency as it melted on the hot asparagus. The risotto was velvety and mild, with just enough mushroom-y flavor. And I ended up waaaaaaay too full for the key lime pie or more than a glass and a half of the wine (which was a bit too fruity for my taste).
I asked this bitch what she thought, and she seemed pleased.
(Thanks always, Texpatriate.)
Thursday, March 15, 2007
From the bottom of my heart, I'm sorry.
I've been so busy that I honestly want to sit down and have a good old fashioned cry. You know the kind of cry that you have and then, at the end, you feel like a wrung out washcloth and all you want to do is crawl in the bed and sleep for twelve hours. That's me. Right now.
Work + spring break + no child care= asskickingham.
So Monday, I worked and Saint Dah took care of the Geej.
Tuesday, I went to IKEA and bought a new desk some drawers to go with the desk, a new toy chest for The Geej, a tea set, new forks, spoons, plates, knives and bowls for The Geej, a new comforter, comforter cover and pillow for the Geej's someday coming twin bed, a HUGE metal bowl in which I will someday toss the best salad ever, an insanely cute lampshade for a lamp in The Geej's room, an even more insanely cute wall lamp that looks like a big flower for her room, a shower curtain (I've since decided I don't want), and some other stuff I'm sure I'm forgetting at the moment. After IKEA, I went and fetched the Geej and we had a perfectly nice evening together. I guess the highlight of the evening was putting Princess Apricot into the hamster ball and letting her roll around the house. SO flipping funny. I thought Earl's head was going to explode. Yep you read that right: the hamster ball was the highlight of my night.
We (that is, The Geej and I) then spent a lovely Wednesday together which included a trip of to my office to see her legions of fans and a loooooooooong trip to the grocery store followed by an even longer nap. Then the big excitement: Geej's boyfriend (and Malcontent Mama's progeny, Anderson) came to spend the night!! Slumber party!! Those two had SO much fun chasing each other and squealing and whatnot. It was Adorablefest 2007 over here. (My mom was thankfully here to lend a hand, however, because no matter how cute they are, two 2-year olds are still quite a bit of work.) After they went to sleep mom and I built the IKEA toy chest and desk. (I also decided I really don't want/need the drawers, so there's another thing I've got to take back to freakin' Round Rock. Grrr...)
Today I was slammed at work from the word go. Not only was I catching up after two days off, I had our weekly team meeting and a big presentation to prepare for. But guess what: at about 2:00 my right eye started freakingthefuck out. It was as if I'd put a few dashes of Tabasco in it. It was killing me and watering and I couldn't figure out why. I took my contact out, and couldn't see anything on it or any tears. But I was going nuts. And I had SO much work to do, but I couldn't see a damn thing. So I went home, driving with one eye closed, mind you, and took the DEVIL contact out. Soon thereafter, La Turista and her lovely husband T-bone picked my bespectacled ass up and we went here to see these dudes. Holy crap, they're a talented lot. It was a whole sweaty lot of fun.
Oh, I forgot to mention that in addition to Adorablefest '07, there's also this other festival in town right now. Anyway all it really means is that:
- There are a lot of people walking around town trying to look cool while really just looking lost
- There is a LOT of free music and really cool shit going on around town that makes you want to play hookie
- Especially when it's sunny and 73 degrees outside
- There is an abnormally large number of Japanese people in Whole Foods looking very confused and buying shitloads of groceries that the then schlep out to the corner while trying to hail a cab (Austin isn't really a "hail a cab" kind of town...especially not at 2pm)
Later we went and ate Mexican food and then crossed the street to the Johnny Cash-themed bar to hang out in the amazing weather and have a cerveza and a michelada or two.
All of this and still home by 9:00pm.
Oh, and did I mention this?
Fuck yes, people! That's a ceiling fan! On my deck!! Yee haw!!! That's been sitting in a box in my garage since last summer. See, I had big plans to get the electricity wired out there and get it hung, but never had the funds or the time to do so. But I decided to put some of my tax refund toward some electrical improvements to La Casa, including this, a new outlet in the entryway (it's always bugged me that there wasn't one there) and a light in the pantry. Yay!!
Next up: wood blinds in the kitchen window (the only window in the house that DOESN'T have wood blinds, and instead has this skanky looking dirty ass honeycomb blind thing. U-g-l-y).
Okay, even thought it FEELS like Friday, I know it's only Thursday, so it's time to shut 'er down and hit the hay.
Mo later, freaks.
Monday, March 12, 2007
Thursday, March 08, 2007
I'm sure that by the end of our time together I will a) know a lot more than I now do about hamsters (which won't be any big feat) and b) be very sure that I never want a hamster of my own.
We're heading to Dallas tomorrow for the weekend. It's a dual purpose visit: I'm going up for a dear friend's baby shower and we're going to visit my mom's sister and her lovely husband (Nanny and Papa, as The Geej calls them) and their wonderful mutt, Missy. Aside from the car ride, it should be a fun trip.
Talk to you fools on Sunday.
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Ya'll...I'm afraid that Earl may be a...pussy.
Yep. I know, I know... It's a shocker. I'm coming to terms with it too.
Breathe, people. Just breathe.
See, he was a stray. Born of the streets. Scruffy. Unrefined. Ugly.
But I took him in. And I love him.
Slowly he relinquished some of his wild ways, but he still insisted on going outside to eat geckos, corner baby possums, poop in flowerbeds, and nude sunbathe with abandon.
I acquiesced, much to the dismay of my pocketbook. You see, part of the curse of the Pussy cat is that he's a lover, not a fighter. And Earl got his ass kicked six or seven ways from Sunday after we moved to 78731. Apparently, "they didn't like his kind cuz he was a bit to leeeeeeisurely. It seemed (he) was busy doin' somethin' next to nothin', but diff'rent than the day before..."
Oh wait. What the fuck?!
Damn You Prince Rogers Nelson! Damn You!
Okay, so $one grand in vet bills and three years later, we moved to the (apparently) MUCH scruffier 78745 area.
At first, Earl was intrigued by the out-of-doors, even gaining a respectable "I'm a Bad Ass!" injury or two. But suddenly, he said, "No more." He was done. Apparently he received the feline equivalent of a gang jump in, and Mama's Boy didn't want any part of it anymore (Good boy!) For him, going outside was no longer something he had the least bit of interest in.
Now, a year later, he will still sit next to the screen of an open window and sniff for hours, but go outside? Um...no.
Take tonight, for example: He's sitting next to the back screen door, practically screaming to go out (if body language is to believed). So I open the door, and this is what happens:
He's all: "Did you hear that? What the fuck was that?! I mean, do you even...OH SHIT. Fuck this!! I'm going back inside."
And yes, he ran inside immediately and is sleeping all upside-down and shit on the bed right now.
But you know what? My cat is a Pussy. And I'm okay with it.*
*Hello? Does anyone else want a t-shirt with that on it?"
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
My lunch with the Other Karla May (OKM) went very well. OKM is a few years older than I, very easy to chat with, a native Texan (although not a refugee from the Pine Curtain like I am), and into and/or directly involved in a lot of the things that intrigue me as well. Theater. Politics. Writing. Graphic design. Food. Organics. Ecological conservation. Music. Keeping Austin weird for real. I liked her a whole lot. I imagine the Karla May meetings will continue. Together, I can imagine we could be quite a force to be reckoned with.
Work is buzzing. There's so much going on. The days are flying by. I've barely had time to catch my breath this week. I love the energy at work right now. But I could also use a breather.
Speaking of, I'm on the verge of planning a trip to the beach with Dah, The Geej and myself. Anyone want to come? I'm thinking a long weekend in early May. Let me know. The more the merrier. Especially where toddlers are concerned.
My toddler proclaimed this evening that she's "two and a half" but that when she's three she wants a party with "ice cream, red icing and pancakes and gum" and that she would love "a tricycle and a hamster and a dog and a kitty." She also gave me her guest list, which included several cats and dogs she knows as well as a few characters from books we read. And Max and Ruby. She wants them there for sure.
I'm dying to hear from my accountant about what's up with my taxes. I know I'm not going to get a windfall like last year's refund, but I'm hoping for at least something. At the very least, I'm praying I don't have to pay. Fucking government with their unjust wars and whatnot. I don't feel like funding that shit any more than I have to.
Many, many other things are floating through my mind, my friends, but I'm way to wiped to share tonight.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
That is 420 one dollar bills. I've been socking them away for a while now, almost every time I get change back that includes ones, and I finally decided to pull them out of the shoebox and count them. I'm not sure what I'm going to splurge on, but I can promise you it's going to be something fun.
2) As most of you know, my real name is not Karla May. My real name--first and last--is rather unusual. In fact, in my entire lifetime, I've only actually met 3 other people with my first name and 1 other with my last name (who wasn't somehow related). So it's been a weird thing knowing that there's another woman in Austin with my exact same name. I've had all these near-misses with meeting her, and LOTS of confusion of people hearing things about this woman (good things, thank God), and thinking it was me. Last week it happened twice. Two different people at work said things to me about the OTHER Karla May that they thought were attributed to me. So finally, I decided enough is enough: I e-mailed this woman who shares my name, and we're going to finally meet. For lunch. Tomorrow. I can't wait! I've known about her since 1994, so it's high time we met. I hope she understands that, like "The Highlander," there can only be one Karla May.
Saturday, March 03, 2007
Friday, March 02, 2007
First hour and a half--Hot stone massage. Oh lordy. Can I just tell you how fucked up I realized my lower back is during this massage? I mean, it's not good.
Next treatment (which took an hour), the avocado body mask--Listen kids, when you get old like me, you skin tends to lose a bit of that natural moisture it used to have in abundance. So basically, you start feeling like and itchy, dried up raisin. Yes, it's as sexy as it sounds. Anyhoo, this whole "winter," I've noticed this particular phenomenon more than ever (thank you surgically-induced menopause!!!), and damn if I haven't been one itchy, flaky mo-fo. So today this gal dry brushes all the sluff off of my skin, then she covers me in this deliciously amazing concoction that "she mixed up this morning" made of fresh avocados, cucumber and pure shea butter. Oh. My. LORD. I smelled like the best salad ever. Then you get wrapped in hot towels and covered neck to foot in a Steamy Wonder (tm), a steam tent that basically cooks you with that wonderful marinade on you. Meanwhile, up north, you're getting a scalp moisturization treatment and massage, and then a mini-facial. Wow. Yes, my skin feels like a 20 year old's right about now.
Finally, a spa pedicure (1 hour). It's sandal weather, people. Screw that "waiting until after Easter" bullshit when you live in Austin. My feet and toes needed their annual "lets get ready to appear in public" dust and shine. It was wonderful, and I even got to read People and Us Weekly while getting pedicurized. Extra bonus!!
After all of this insane luxury, I went and wandered around a book store. When was the last time I did that? God, I don't even know. Which is extra sad when you factor in the fact that I work across the street from one of the best independent bookstores in the country. Sigh. It was delightful, and I got out of there for less than $40.
Next up: Mindless movie. Went to see "Reno 911: Miami" with La Turista and had popcorn, Coke, and Twizzlers for lunch. Yum. The movie's not going to win any Oscars, but it was fun enough.
Went home. Decided to lie down "for a minute." The windows were open, and it was so pleasant. Plus, I was still feeling noodle-y from my spa treatments. Ended up sleeping for 2 1/2 hours. In the same position. Woke up stiff as the tin man and starving.
Started some laundry. Talked to The Geej and Dah. Tried to figure out if there was anything in this house I wanted to eat. Decided there wasn't. Called in an order to my favorite Thai place. Went to pick it up, and they were slammed! It took forever. I saw three people from work, and I looked like hammered/oily/relaxed hell. Oh well.
Came home, talked to Mr. Wonderful. I miss that guy. Ate dinner. Watched "Strangers With Candy." Finished laundry. Balanced checkbook.
See how important you are to me?
But seriously: Why can't I have a day like this once every other month?