Friday, June 29, 2007
Well, if this shit actually happens, you can kiss that loveliness described above good-bye.
So, you know, do something.
(Have I mentioned lately that I hate our government?)
*You know when I call you "Bitches" it's because I fucking love you, right? Don't hate...
2.) That when I took this photo out of the 6th floor of my office building, the sun was actually shining, and there wasn't a raindrop to be seen.
3.) That I've managed to post something--no matter how lame or inept--every single day this week. Woo hoo!! I'm blogcrazy!
Thursday, June 28, 2007
You know, something along the lines of this...
I'm secretly hoping this deluge of rain continues so that the parade gets cancelled.
Holyfuckingshit, ya'll. My mom's a fucking Plungette.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
As if we didn't already know that he was a paranoid, power-hungry, heartless, evil, slimy shit bag...
What's that bubbling sound I'm hearing?
Oh, wait. It's just my blood.
Monday, June 25, 2007
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Lovely Lake Buchanan.
The interior of my cottage.
The view from my porch.
Both Jaye and I killed scorpions in our rooms. Not too surprising given the landscape and the time of year, but still...
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Sorry, I'm just not "feelin' it" ya'll.
I had a day that started shitty, got better, and sort of ended shitty. Shitty bookends, so to speak. And now I'm in the throes of preparing to take my team on a two-day "teambuilding" on one of the beautiful Highland Lakes. It rained off and on all day today, so I'm also in the throes of praying for good weather.
I can't wait for the road trip tomorrow and the scenery and being with my friends, who also happen to be my coworkers. I really am lucky in that respect.
I'll give you a full report (with photos, yay!) post facto, but for now I'll leave you with this handwritten proof that money does not buy you brains. My penmanship ain't the best, but at least it doesn't look like it did in 4th grade.
- Geej woke me up for the first time at 3:05 to go tee tee.
- She woke me up for the second time at 3:20 just for the Hell of it.
- She woke me up for a third time at 5:00am-ish. Let her crawl into the bed, but never really got back to sleep.
- Had a wicked nightmare about being back in Vladivostok now and them taking The Geej away from me. (This is the second time I've had this dream in a couple of weeks. It's awful.)
- Started raining like crazy as we left the house for school.
- Couldn't find my umbrella.
- Got soaked while running The Geej into school.
- Everything was fine until it was time for me to leave, at which time she threw a Stage 4 meltdown (Stage 5 being the worst ever, like what happened at AO's party).
- Got re-soaked on the way back to the car.
- Sat in insane traffic (caused by the fact that it was pouring) for the short drive downtown.
- When I got to work (finally), the parking garage's "legal" spots were taken up, so my only option was to park illegally or park a block and a half away and hoof it to work, again in the pouring rain. I opted for the illegal option.
Urgh. Grumble. Growl.
As soon as I logged on to my computer at work, I sent a preemptive e-mail to my team, apologizing in advance for the fact that I was going to be snippy and snarly today because I was in a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad mood.
Hopefully I won't get towed and rocking out to my iTunes will help deliver me from this funk.
Sunday, June 17, 2007
But I'm fearful about three. I've had more than a few mothers tell me three is horrible, challenging, and anything but fun. I got a glimpse of it yesterday at Annie O's fourth birthday party. Things were going well: The Geej rode all of the rides (except for the "ponytails" i.e., the ponies, despite the fact that that's all she could talk about on the way to the party), and she seemed happy and content. But then I said no to her demand for a second piece of birthday cake, and all Hell broke loose. Seriously ya'll, I have never EVER seen her throw a tantrum like this. She was screaming and kicking me and scratching my face and neck and pulling my hair. It was horrifying. It was like she'd suddenly been possessed by Satan. She was so out of control, it was scary. Of course, everyone at the party was staring at us with a mixture of pity, horror and surprise. The Geej is normally so well-behaved, that I think most of the parents there were just as shocked as I was by what was going on. I managed to pick her thrashing body up and take her to a corner of the park to talk with her, and as soon as I let go of her, she ran away from me, screaming "No Mommy!! No! No! No!" When I finally caught up with her, she practically collapsed in my arms and said, "I'm tired. I want to go home." That made two of us. The rest of the day was challenging as well--lots of whining and major attitude when she didn't get her way. What the hell, people? It's like she's changed overnight. Today was a wee bit better, but there was still plenty of brattitude and whining. I just can't stand whining.
As of right this second, I must say, I'm not looking very forward to three. But if Annie O. and her parentals made it through alive, I guess The Geej and I can too.
Friday, June 15, 2007
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Case(s) in point:
The mold made of my teeth when I was getting braces...in 1983.
Merit badges I earned as a Bluebird (circa late 1970s). One was for swimming, and I think the other one was for raising chickens or for my falconer skills. At least that's what it looks like.
These horrifyingly ugly earrings from Pier 1 (remember when they used to sell jewelry?) given to me by my aunt (mid-1990s).
This kick ass button drawn my me and made by me with a friend's button maker. Hopefully it was never actually WORN by me, but I can't be too sure (mid-80s).
A pin (one of a series) that was ordered by me and my friend Lori Williams in 9th grade. We sent off for them from an ad in the back of "Rolling Stone." Lori was OBSESSED--and I mean it--with Huey Lewis, and so she got an "I (heart) Huey" pin and I got this one that reads, "I (heart) The News." I also had one that read, "I (heart) Eddie Money." What a fucking DORK, ya'll!
This little dude in an outhouse. You put water in the base, then you open the outhouse door, and the little dude turns around and pees on you. Yuk yuk yuk and hardee har her!
Wait a second. That's actually pretty cool.
But seriously, I need professional help. I must rid myself of some of the clutter in my life. This has gotten pretty ridiculous. I'm totally turning in to my mom...
Monday, June 11, 2007
Finally, I'd had enough and started looking into renting a convertible for the weekend, just so I could get it out of my system. Memorial Day weekend was a bust. So was the weekend following. But then this past weekend, I got lucky. Orbitz.com hooked me up with the lowest cost convertible deal in town at Alamo out at the airport.
Mom had already planned on taking The Geej with her to Houston on Saturday to attend this big family shindig that I really wasn't that in to attending (more on that later). Plus, I needed to be at the house on Saturday to accept delivery of some furniture (more on that later too). So I booked the car, and soon after Mom and Geej headed toward Houston, I headed to the airport to get my car. I got to the rental counter, and the gal who was working there got on the phone to confirm my vehicle was there with the guy at the lot. I was fully expecting to get a PT Cruiser convertible because that's what they showed on their website and on the "Cars Available" sign at the counter. See, this was all part of my ultimate plan: I would rent something that I would never EVER buy--like a PT Cruiser--and I'd hate it so much that the convertible jones would be a thing of the past. Also, it was going to be hot as fuck this past weekend, so I figured I'd spend my whole time miserable and that would put yet another nail in my convertible coffin. But then this happened:
Oh. My. GOD!! I loved it!! I miss my Volkswagen, so being back in a VW felt like wearing a pair of comfy old shoes. And holy CRAP is this a cute car! It was like a Barbie car. Seriously, when they pointed me to this thing at the Alamo lot, I was like, "I am SO fucked." My plan was backfiring all over the place. I went and got Jaye, and we spent all Saturday afternoon riding around the picturesque hills of Austin, drinking our large Sonic iced teas, getting sunburned, and talking shit. It was paradise.
That evening, we went and picked up another friend of ours and drove up to the Arboretum to see a movie. Driving with the top down on a summer night is, seriously, better than therapy.
Meanwhile, in Houston, The Geej was also in paradise because she was getting to hang out with Dah and a real live human baby!! (He's the newest addition to our family; the first child of my cousin and his wife.)
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
This is Abby. Poor Abby.
When I asked the Geej what had happened to this poor baby, she told me, "A frog bit her." Oh.
*My mom was having some tests run. No worries.
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Monday, June 04, 2007
As I predicted, there were PLENTY of "hotties" (a.k.a. bikers, see previous post) for The Geej and I to ogle this weekend. In the 50 mile trip from my mom's house to mine on Sunday, we counted 80. And each time she saw one (or, more frequently, groups of more than one), Geej would squeal, "Mommy!! Yook!! More hotties!! Yots of dem!!" Yes my dear...I see them.
Jaye and I rang in the start of summer (if not on the calendar, at least mentally) with a hot dog grillin', beer drankin', potato chip munchin', Fudgcicle slurpin', Meatballs watchin' movie event on Friday evening.
But, truth be told, we only drank like 4 beers (and a Zima...oh YES I did!) and called it a night by 9:30. We sort of suck.
Saturday, I walked in to Target with the following on my list:
- Gift Card/Graduation Card
Speaking of shit I really don't need: Will someone please tell me how I ended up on the following mailing list?
I mean, yes, like most Americans, I get about 30 credit card solicitations in the mail a week, but this has got to be one of the strangest ones yet.
And on the back printed in big, black all caps: THIS IS NOT A VALID CREDIT CARD! Really? Hmmm... As if the lack of magnetic strip, the 1-800 number printed on the front, and/or that it is made of cardstock wouldn't have clued the typcial brain-dead Stop-n-Go cashier in to that fact.
One last little nugget of info for you:
My recycle bin was stolen last week. (I know! Right?) Anyway, the place to get a new one is at your nearest fire station. I'm embarassed to say that, after 1 1/2 years in my house, I didn't know where the "nearest" fire station was, so I opted instead to go to the one that was nearest to my work. I went Friday morning, and sort of half-knocked on the side door, not really knowing what one does when one wants to gain entrance to a fire station. I started to walk away, when this nice man opened the door and asked, "Can I help you ma'am?" Ask 98% of the hetero females you know, and they'll tell you, "There's just something about firemen..." I mean, I used to drool over my yard guy who was also a (married, with a young daughter) fireman. Man, was he hot (no pun intended). So imagine my disappointment when the 3 firemen I encountered during my first ever steps inside a fire station were...um...not so hot. Nice as hell, but...yeah.
Well, turns out, they were completely wiped out of recycle bins (way to go, Austin!!), but showed me the fire station nearest my house on their map.
Saturday morning, after my financially devastating trip to Target, I went to this fire house and--holy GOD--the stereotypical super-hot fireman opened the door. I'm not shitting ya'll--he was like 6' 5", dark hair, big guns, blue eyes, great smile and...wait for it...DIMPLES!! When he asked, "Hi. What can I do for you?" my knees got weak. I think I sputtered something about recycling bins or something, and next thing I know, he's carrying them out to the car for me. I got to walk behind him and let me just say, that view was as good as the one from the front. My, my. (NOTE TO MR. WONDERFUL: Please get down here as soon as possible. Thank you.) Bookhart, you live right around the corner from this place. Might I suggest paying them a visit on Saturday morning...say about 11:00. C'mon...you KNOW you need an extra bin.
Okay, that's all for now. More about my exciting life later.
Friday, June 01, 2007
The Geej is going to lose her effin' mind. She's SO crazy about motorcycles (thanks to my mom teaching her to yell "Hottie!" each time she sees someone on one).