I shouldn't blog when I'm cranky.

But I'm going to. And you'd better not try to stop me. Damnit.

Oh, where to start, people...

I guess I'll start with the weather, because that's lame. But yes, it's already titty-sweat hot here in the Heart O' Texas. Yeah, I said it. I am sticky 90% of the day because of the 90% humidity. GRUMPY!!

Next, I got the city/county tax appraisal thing for my house, which went up the annual maximum despite the fact that the actual amount I'd be able to sell my house for is in the toilet thanks to the economy. Oh yeah, and I also need to immediately pay a $600 from my escrow account because they misunderestimated my taxes last year. Yes I know that's grammatically incorrect. Shut up. CRANKY!!

I have a theory about los ninos: Odd numbered years*: suck. Case in point: The Geej at age two? Such a joy. Easy. Happy. Totally blew that whole "Terrible Twos" myth out of the water. Age three:. She was 49% angel, 51% sassy-ass demon spawn. It wasn't fun. Four has been a hilarious, wonderful dream. But five is looming on the very near horizon, and girlfriend is showing signs of the Odd Year-ed Demon, and I'm not loving it. ANNOYING!!

*Age one doesn't count because even though they can be frustrating, they're one, and you get like a billion extra cuteness points when you're one. But nearly five? Notsomuch.

Will someone PLEASE tell me why, all of the sudden, after MONTHS of perfect litter box behavior, one of my damn cats has decided to just barely miss the litter box about 3/4 of the time. Seriously? You can't get your little cat ass all the way into the litter box to deposit your foul leavings within the confines of the damn box? Really? DEATH!!!

City elections. I went to vote on Saturday, and here was the scene at my polling place: Only one parking place (besides the one I took) had a car in it. Tumbleweeds were blowing around.** Walked in, and there were barely animated corpses working behind the registration tables and voting machine instruction stands. I'm serious!! ZOMBIES!! I voted (it took all of 1 minute for the whole thing to go down) and walked to my car. As I made my way across the empty parking lot, a lone coyote howled forlornly in the distance.***

**This is a slight exaggeration.
***Again, artistic license is at play here. PLEASE NOTE: There is no note about the ZOMBIES, and that's because, I'm fairly convinced that the individuals working there were, in fact, the Undead.

I finished a book last week that had taken me forever to read. I am not a slow reader, but usually my only time to read is right at bed time, so I get 5 - 7 pages done, and then I'm falling asleep. I don't care how great whatever I'm reading may be. So I finally finish this book I've been reading since February, and I go out to our rather eclectic book collection and grab something that I'd bought a while back and am psyched to read. I lie down, ready to get started on my new book and DAMNITTOHELL I realize I've already freakin' read it. DISAPPOINTING!!

Whew. Wow...okay. I think I'm better now. Thanks for letting me vent. I thought the top of my skull was gonna blow off there for a minute. Now for some stuff that's NOT making my stabby:

I love succulents. Cactus especially. So one of my favorite things about my workplace is the AMAZING collection of prickly pear cactus that grows on the "Plaza Level." This time of year, if the recent rains have been adequate, they go nuts with TONS of blooms. Here's a picture from the end of last week:

Today, they were even prettier (but I didn't have my camera with me)).

Went to another kid's b-day party this weekend. Thankfully, this one wasn't at a nightclub where the bathroom smelled like vomit. It was actually very fun, and the kiddos went nuts and bounced around in bouncy houses and ate cake and did all the stuff you're supposed to do at a b-day party for the wee ones. And would you please look at The Geej and Annie-O in this photo? All I had to do was say, "Girls...picture!" and it was like instant Phototech*.*If you know what I'm talking about, then you're my people.

And just in case you were wondering: Yes, Anderson still likes birthday cake.After the kiddo party, it was time for a birthday celebration for a grown up friend--my friend Erin. It was way fun and I got to chat and hang out with friends I don't get to see much anymore (unless it's on freakin' F*cebook). I have a few pictures, but the only one I'm really wondering about is this one:
This was a sculpture in the pool cabana where the party was sort of centered. It fills me with so many questions...

Finally, Mother's Day.

I gotta say, I am blessed to know some of the coolest, most skillful, wisest, loveliest, most amazing mothers ever. I learn from them each and every day, and I would sometimes be an utter and complete basket case without them. So even though it's a day late and a dollar short: Happy Mother's Day to you wonderful women. You know who you are.

My Mother's Day? I got to sleep in (until 9:30!), and then got taken to brunch here. I recommend it. My gifts were so awesome, that I hesitate to post photos, for fear your eyes may explode in your skull due to the pure coolness. But here you go:

From The Geej:
Paint-by-number-freakin'-kittens, people!! If you know me even a little bit, then you know how much I love this. She said that BH "helped her a little." All I know is that this is so great, I can't stand it.

From BH:

Whilst at the craft store, BH was inspired by a clock-making kit, and this is the result:
Can you even BELIEVE how awesomely horrible this thing is?! I nearly peed myself when he gave it to me. And if you've ever watched "The Tim & Eric Awesome Show: Great Job!," you'll understand why I think it's so funny. It's totally going to work with me and hanging in my modular work station.****

****cube

So that's it until tomorrow. By the way, tomorrow is officially the beginning of the FUNNEST WEEK EVER (r)!! Details to come.