Pilfered and Filched

In other words, snagged from Amagets who stole it from Karla and so on.

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4:
“This book is printed on acid-free paper.” (an example of a paper durability statement that may be found in a copyright mark…from The Chicago Manual of Style.)

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can and see what you touch:
The left return of my desk (I’m at work).

3.What is the last thing you watched on TV?
A bit of “The Colbert Report” last night.

4.Without looking, guess what time it is:
11:30 a.m.

5.Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
11:45 a.m.

6.With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
The drone of the “white noise” maker above my cube; two coworkers talking; the copy machine; other people typing on keyboards; the voices inside my head, whispering, “Kill…kill…”

7.When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Earlier this morning; walked through the parking garage and into the store for the requisite 1.5 L of spring water and early morning sustenance.

8.Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
A Yahoo Finance site, watching the primary stock I own plummet.

9.What are you wearing?
A plum-colored, scoop neck sweater, a dark velvet scarf, a blue jean jacket, jean/trousers (Karla, you know what I’m talking about), black trouser socks, black shoes, silver earrings/rings/bracelet/watch.

10.Did you dream last night?
Not that I can recall. I actually slept really well last night for the first time this week.

11. When did you last laugh?
This morning while waking the baby up. She was talking to me in her weird language with utter bed-head, and it just cracked me up.

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
I’m not in a “room” per se; I’m in a cube. Let’s see: my company’s quarterly calendar; An enormous, cheesy calendar featuring Asian Ladies sent to me from my friend Tom in NYC; Tibetan prayer flags; a receipt for a workshop I’m going to in March; company phone directory; a certificate from an instructional design course I took in 2004; Buttons: “The Donnas,” “Lucky Me! I live in Pine Tree,” “We are Certified Organic.”

13. Seen anything weird lately?
Yes, actually. On the way to work this morning, I got behind this black Kia Spectra on MoPac, and it’s owner had put all of these big lettered phrases across the trunk/bumper: Duran Duran. A-HA. Berlin. Erasure. Depeche Mode. Mesh. (and finally) Keyboards Rule!

14. What do you think of this quiz?
It’s not totally retarded.

15. What is the last film you saw?
I honestly can’t remember. In the theater, the last thing I saw was “Brokeback Mountain.” But I know I’ve seen something since then on the tube. It must’ve sucked, because I can’t remember it.

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
I’d like to buy the world a coke… I really don’t know. I guess I’d pay off my mom’s house, and get her whatever else she needed. I’d put a HUGE chunk of it in a trustfund for The Geej and make sure she had enough to put her through medical school debt free. And then, from there, I haven’t a clue…

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know.
I am a very particular sleeper—like the princess in the “Princess and the Pea.”

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
Eradicate profound poverty.

19. Do you like to dance?
Yes. But I feel sorry for anyone who watches me do it. Elaine from Seinfeld and I have a lot in common when it comes to dancing.

20.George Bush: WARNING. You are being monitored:
Take the hate I feel toward Toby Keith, and multiply it by a billion, and you get close to what I feel for you. You are, truly, an idiot.

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
I thought I would name my girl child Gilda, but I didn’t.

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
James or Gordon

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Not while my mother is still alive.

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
“You can stop worrying now.”

25. 4 people who must also do this meme in THEIR journal:
You in the pink shirt, you with the short blonde hair, you with the glasses, and over there in the corner, you.