I was a weird, weird kid.

So, as verified by my previous post, I've come into something of a windfall of blog-worthy material. Most recent discovery: A diary purchased at K-mart and contributed to sporadically from 1976 (age 7) to 1982 (age 13).

It is so...well...I'll let the words speak for themselves: (These entries are in order by month. The years are all fucked up. So are the spelling and grammar. If you see regular parentheses, those are comments from back in the day. Anything bracketed by these: [ ] are modern day comments, to help you understand the context.)

1/1/76
Dear Diary (DD),
I took my tape recorder. And put it buy the door where some girls were talking. I was recording them.

1/2/76
DD,
I went to my dad's. It was very dull. All he did was sleep and watch tv. That's why it was so dull.

1/3/76
DD,
Monday, I went to school. I was so-so. But who can help that. How do you think I draw:

1/4/76
DD,
I put water in Kim's seat. She never found out.

1/5/76
DD,
[no entry]

1/6/76
DD,
I hate Roy.
[At this point, my future stepfather Roy was dating my recently-divorced, very hot mom. I was not a fan of him, or the situation I found myself in. Obviously.]

1/7/76
I HATE ROY!
[Written in prison escapee psycho script handwriting.]

1/8/76
I Hate Hate Hate ROY!

1/9/76
DD,
Lauri, Gina's sister, is a real nice girl too. She can sing's good too.
[Apparently I went a little retarded on this day.]

1/10/82
DD,
Today I went over to Rodney Carrington's*. It wasn't too fun. I swear he's the biggest flirt! I absolutely hate Paige [his sister]! What a snob! I'm going with Kevin Heilman, but I'm in LOVE with Kevin Jones (as always)!

More,
Later

*The "Rodney Carrington" I'm writing about here is comedian/actor Rodney Carrington. He's got his own sitcom in its 2nd season on ABC. Who knew?

1/26/year unknown
Traci is very stupid. And I hate her and she sings horribble And she is so moody she thinks she is so great

1/27/various years
Here is how I write:
[Followed by handwriting samples of my signatures from 1976, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, and 82. Again, a scanner would be awesome right about now.]

1/30/76
Today is my BIRTHDAY

2/15/year unknown
Mike is so moody. One minute he's nice, next he's mean.

2/26/81
No matter how he hurts or treats me I will always love Marty Pliler. I wil love him more than any other boy. Only you, God, and I know this and that's how it will always be. Some day I hope hel love me at last half as much as I love him. I think about him continulously day or/and night. Please, let him feel and know these words as I am writing them. And someday soon let him feel the same way. I LOVE Marty Pliler. (no erase)
[I wrote "no erase," but this entire entry is scribbled over with the words "NO WAY" over it.]

2/28/81
Tonight has been a wonderful night. Me & Shelli wnt to the mall with Marty Pliler and Steve McClure. Marty asked us to go! I can't believe it! We didn't do anything though. Tammy would kill us and the last thing I want to do is hurt Tammy. We just walked around and talked and it was fun. I don't even know why I'm going out with Dale. I don't love him half as much as I like Marty. Arghhhhhhhhhhh!

Memo: [There's a "Memo" section at the end of each month.]
Mrs. Neel [my 4th grade teacher] is so so so picky. I can knot stand her!!!

Next Entry: March thru May.