In order to prepare to shower, I must have help. My mother has been helping me wrap my upper arm in Glad press-and-seal wrap topped off by medical tape. This is to protect my PICC line from getting too wet and causing its bearings to come loose. I also try (in vain) to protect my abdominal drain from water as well, but it's such a lost cause that I've pretty much said "fuck it" to that whole ordeal. I have to wear this weird velcro belt thing around my middle, to which the collection bulb from this drain (or whatever the hell it's called) attaches. That way it doesn't have to attach to my clothes and also, I don't have to worry about holding the damn thing while I shower. (Mind you, I didn't get this belt thing until I'd had the drain for about a week, so showering prior to, while holding that damn bulb thing in one hand while wrangling my wrapped up PICC line arm on the other side was a real treat). So after all this prep work, I guess it's not too weird that I got into the shower tonight with my bra on. And I just showered away, washing and rinsing my hair, before I even noticed I was wearing it. Can you say, "Out of it?"
Also, despite the fact that I'm on unpaid medical leave from work and I'm sure I'm about to have a gagillion medical/hospital bills start filling my mailbox, today I went out and bought this:
See, here's the deal: I was at this jeweler a couple of months ago for something totally different (I bought a $50 pair of earrings), and I saw this ring. I tried it on and fell in love. It's a blue topaz surrounded by diamonds set in white gold. Man, it's pretty. Anyway, I resisted temptation and didn't buy it, but I kept thinking about it. After I got my promotion, I thought, "Hell, I deserve that ring. I'm going to go see if it's still there, and if it is, I'm getting it." But I never went by there. Well, when I got home from the hospital/P.O.W. camp, I had a "customer loyalty" $50 off offer from the jeweler waiting for me in my big ol' stack of mail. (I'm a damn sucker for coupons, by the way.) Once again I said to myself, "I'm going to go there, and if that ring is still there, I'm getting it." So I did. I guess it'll be the first thing I pawn when I can't make the mortgage...
7 comments:
We absolutely love it. We shit our collective pant. Dam and Tammy.
Do you really need proof?
I actually have my own little eye on a blue topaz ring to replace the engagement ring the crackheads stole from me. But it's not near that fancy. Ain't you something or other!
You only live once! Keep the ring and pawn the wedding ring.
I think it is great that you got the ring. I hope it always reminds you of what you went through and how lucky you are to be here.
Thanks for the f-bomb (thought you were going soft for a minute) and shower visual, yikes.
If you need cash..I'm sure there's someone out there typing "velcro/saran wrap/bra" into a porn search engine as we speak.
Hope you're over this crap soon!
You deserve that ring. It was meant for you, or it wouldn't have been there anymore. Enjoy the sparklies.
My word verification? rhruh. Scooby Doo agrees with me.
You totally deserve that ring.
And the medical bills? Don't freak. It's all covered at 100% after you hit the out of pocket max. You're going to be fine.
Dude you totally deserve it. And might I say your nails look lovely?
And look at the showering in your bra as actually being extra efficient...laundry and hygiene simultaneously!
Post a Comment