This isn't probably the most "appropriate" post to be putting up on Mother's Day, but what the hell.
Soon after I moved into this house, I got a flyer on my door for "Don's Landscaping Service," and I needed someone to mow my yard, so I gave Don a call. Turns out, he's a fireman, but on his off days, he mows lawns to earn some extra cash. While I was at work, he went by and checked out the yard and called to tell me it would cost $30 a pop to mow it. So began our relationship: I'd call him and say, "Can you come by some time this week?" And he'd say, "How's Thursday?" And I'd say, "Fine, I'll leave you a check." And I would come home to my neatly mowed lawn.
He sounded like a nice enough guy on the phone, but we went months without ever actually meeting each other face-to-face. Then one day, I was running late for work, and he showed up to mow before I'd left. So I thought I'd introduce myself and hand him his check rather than leaving it clothes-pinned to the mailbox as usual.
Oh. My. God. He was TOTALLY hot. I mean steaming. Great legs. Dark eyes and hair. Killer smile. Amazing arms. And did I mention he's a fucking FIREMAN?! Oh lawdy. I remember I was blushing acting like a 12 year old when I was talking to him. Totally ridiculous. And somehow, I'd forgotten to look on his left hand to see if he was married. Almost immediately, the bad 70s porn scenarios started playing in my head: "You say you need your grass trimmed?" "Yes! Yes! Yes! Mow my lawn!"
Well, the years have rolled slowly by, and Don's still coming by to cut the lawn. I've learned that yes, he is married and he's got a baby daughter named Ava. I spoke with him before I left for Russia to arrange yard-mowing while I was gone, and told him what I was up to with the adoption and everything. He thought it was wonderful.
So this week, when I heard the mower crank up out front, I took Geej out to meet Mr. Hotness. He was so sweet, saying how gorgeous she is and how our eyes look alike. And I was thinking dirty, dirty thoughts about his fine ass the whole time. Sigh.
I guess I'm turning into one of the Desperate Housewives.
3 comments:
Long time reader, first time commenter (I believe). Happy Mother's Day to you and that beautiful daughter of yours!
Is it like the old Coke adds where he slowly and sweatily peels off his white tank top, arms straining and muscles bulging as you bring him that ice cold drink, which he first rubs the cold glass on his nipples and chest to cool off and then licks the driplets of water off his lips as he savors...that...first...sip?
Or is that just me?
Dirty dirty thoughts? Shame on you!
Where are the PICTURES of the yard guy? Hehehe. And you can have whatever thoughts you want.
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