Saturday, November 06, 2004

So sorry about your microscopic penis.

Tonight I was on my way to downtown to a wedding. (Going stag, as usual.) It was about 5;30, and I was speeding down MoPac when this big ass black truck came up beside me. It was in the lane to my right and a few feet ahead of me. The guy driving it had his window down, and he stuck his left arm out the window and gave me the "L" sign for loser. Sort of shaking it at me. See, I have two anti-Bush bumper stickers on my Jetta. And no, I haven't taken them off since the election because, guess what, I still detest Bush and his cabinet. Anyway, I just acted like I didn't see him, and so he stuck his big, meaty white head out the window, looked back at me (while driving, mind you) and did the "L" sign on his forehead. To let him know that I had, indeed, seen him, I gave him the middle finger salute and mouthed "FUCK YOU!" right at him. So what did he do? Slammed on his breaks, got behind me and tailgated me so closely that I couldn't even see the headlights on that monstrosity he was driving. I was scared to death. I mean, if I'd even tapped my breaks, he would've been in my backseat. Luckily, when I exited (which was pretty quickly), he didn't follow.

But really: What WAS this? I mean, I've got stickers that express MY opinion, on MY vehicle that I make payments on. I'm driving down the road--a woman alone in my MUCH smaller car--and this total, brainless asshole feels the need to harass me at 65 mph. And when I have the audacity to react to it, he endangers both of us by tailgating me.

Dude: In case you haven't learned because a) you don't know how to read and/or b) you've been too busy jacking off to your Toby Keith concert DVDs--YOUR GUY WON! Why in the hell are you so threatened by me expressing my freedom of speech by displaying a couple of bumper stickers on my station wagon that you've got to harass and endanger me? Let's see...white, male, bad hair cut, driving a gas-guzzling vehicle, feeling threatend by someone minding their own business who just happens to have an opinion different than yours, and then harassing them to the point where they're fearful and/or endangered...yep, sounds like a Republican to me. You've done your party proud, Jack Ass.

No comments: