Thursday, December 02, 2010

Meet Timmy!

In case you don't know me know me or can't tell from this blog, I have a weird sense of humor. The stupider and more ridiculous, the funnier to me. But I also really love intelligent, high-brow wit. So everything from fart jokes to Oscar Wilde, I find amusing.

One of the reasons I love BH so much, is that he and I have very similar tastes in the absurd. We will laugh at stuff that, I assure you, no one else on this planet would think was humorous in the least.

Which brings me to Timmy.

In BH's little town that he lived in in Colorado, there was an old five-and-dime on Main Street called Duckwall's. Although I sadly never went to Duckwall's myself, BH had plenty of stories--and some interesting merchandise--from there that I felt as if I'd been a life time shopper.

On one of his visits to Duckwall's, BH found and purchased this horrible stuffed rat looking thing that he knew I would find just as funny and disturbing as he did. He was right. We named him Timmy. And during one of my visits to Colorado (Boulder, actually) to see BH prior to his moving here, we had a little fun with Timmy and the digital camera.

While looking for a photo in my old files yesterday, I came upon these pics and was laughing my ass off.

So, without futher ado:

"Somebody with thumbs needs to open up these fake-ass Corn Nuts, like NOW!"

"Aw yeah...that's more like it!! Nomnomnomcrunchnom."
"Day-um! Those fake-ass corn nuts make a rat thirsty! Since there's no Brawndo, I'll have to make due with this water."
"Looks like Lindsay Lohan's up to her ol' coke-snortin' and whorin' ways! Color me shocked."
"Why the Hell can't Pam and Bobby just work this shit out?"

"Don't tell BH, but I also put his toothbrush in my butt!"

"After all those corn nuts, what did you expect?"

"This book doesn't have enough pictures! Tuck me in, douchebag!"

"Faster! I said FASTER, asshole, or I'll chew your eyes out while you're sleeping!!"
"I want some more Tic-Tacs, damnit!" 

"Ima make this omlette my bitch!"
Like me, Timmy had a fondness for cussing. I say "had" because, sadly, Timmy is no longer with us. The last time we saw him, he was headed for "a better life" at the Travis County Landfill, and he was bitching every step of the way.


Karla said...

YOu are some total wierdos. And i love you. My fave is the one of Timmy on the toilet. (of course)


Garreth said...

I can't believe you killed Timmy

Lumberyard said...

OMG that is some funny shit! I am in tears laughing so hard. Thanks for that one. Timmy needs his own show!

Anonymous said...

You needed a picture of Lassie with the caption: "What's that, Lassie? Timmy's About to Be Thrown Down the Well?"