I see what you're doing, Luby's, and I do NOT approve.

Much like my love for baby animals, my love of Luby's is well-known. Is the food great? No. Is the atmosphere special? No. Do I get some sort of special deal for publicizing my love of this Texas institution? No. And I've tried to explain my enduring devotion to Luby's to non-Texans, and it just does not compute. But what it boils down to is the comfort factor--I ate there a lot as a kid, and other than some cosmetic alterations, occasional fluctuations in quality and some annoying operational changes (I miss the damn tea cart, yo!), dining at Luby's has remained a fairly unchanged experience for over thirty years.

Until this past weekend.

Ask any Texan, "What's the one thing that Luby's is sort of famous for?" and you can almost bet money on the fact that they'll respond with: the fried fish. Oh. My. God, y'all. I love the SHIT out of this nutritionally devoid mystery fish. It's rectangular and fried and I smother it in fresh squeezed lemon juice and go to fried fish heaven. The sides change, but the entree is always ALWAYS the fried fish for this Pine Curtain Gal.

BEHOLD!

This glorious image, courtesy of The Gluttonous Chinaman.

So The Geej (who has inherited my love of Luby's in a BIG way) and I go to have some lunch while running errands this past weekend, and when I slide my tray to the entree section of the line and ask the server for the fried fish, I notice...it's different. My fried fish rectangle I've been eating FOR DECADES has shrunk by at least 1/3. I mean it went from being about the size of my hand to the size of just my palm. Not okay, Luby's!! Why you gotta go and mess with my fish? And yes, my ass is bigger than it should be, so I know this smaller portion is "better for me" and all that shit, but I never ordered the fried fish for health reasons. And I feel, I dunno, betrayed. And little pissed. You just HAD to go and fuck with THE ONE THING that hadn't changed since I was small enough to have to get help carrying my tray to the table.

Luby's has messed with their sacred cow, and this dude does not abide.