The Wind In My Hair And Snot In My Head

The purchase of Klaus (that's my new car's name) coincided with two things: the first cool front of the autumn season (Yay!) and a spike in the mold/ragweed that's in the air. So yes I've been riding around with Klaus's top down whenever possible, but the result is that I'm 80% dead due to hardcore seasonal allergies. From the neck up, I'm just a big ol' glob of snot encased in a skull. Sunday--the first day after enjoying Klaus--I woke up and, literally, couldn't speak because my throat was so fucked up. I got some OTC meds, dosed myself, and suffered through the day, only to end up going to bed at 5:45pm, full of NyQuil. It helped. I'm functional now, but really, really gross sounding.

Let's see, what else...

Oh yes! Last night Jaye and I went to Stubb's to see Pavement. We were so lame, we left about an hour into the show, and ended up getting home at 9:45pm. I've pretty much decided that, unless I truly, deeply, insanely love a band, I don't want to go to any more "sold out" shows at Stubb's. It's just NOT enjoyable being crammed into that venue with that many other humans. Especially when the humans you're crammed in there with are all smoking and fairly drunk. It was just an annoy-a-thon from the get-go. And although I really like Pavement, I don't LOVE LOVE LOVE them like I do some other bands, so it just wasn't worth the hassle to stay to the end of the show. Luckily, the next five shows I have tickets to are seated.

I am old. There, I said it.

When I arrived home in my neighborhood after last night's show (top down, of course), there were still news trucks, police cars, and rude-ass gawkers standing outside of this guy's house. Yep. He lived on my street. Sad story. All of it.

Tomorrow night, Bookhart and I are beginning a 6-week writing workshop led by the wonderful Spike Gillespie. I'm beyond excited. I'm hoping it will help me get (what's left of) my mojo back. Plus, the idea of just having 2 hrs. a week dedicated to being creative and getting to hang out with Bookhart as well just makes me way happy.

To celebrate our 2nd anniversary, I booked a little house on the river near the charming little town of Wimberly for a long weekend. It looks adorable, sits on 25 acres, and has 500+ feet of riverfront. Can't wait.

Finally, it looks like my mom and this man she's been dating for several months are getting pretty serious. They're talking marriage. I'm happy for her and am looking forward to getting to know him better. I'm not sure how well The Geej is going to take having to share her precious Dah's affections for the first time ever, but I'm sure she'll adjust. Speaking of The Geej, she is digging Klaus. She said she wantst to grow her hair long enough to put in a ponytail while she's cruising around in the back seat.

That kid...

My first post as a forty year old person.

Whoa.

How the hell did THAT happen?! All of the sudden, poof, I'm freakin' FORTY years old!! I need a new driver's license. I'm pretty sure I need bifocals. And I'm entering a new actuarial category.

Ugh. I simply cannot believe it. And PLEASE don't give me that mug-appropriate platitude crap that, "You're only as young as you feel!" and whatnot. Bullshit. I'm forty. Now I just need to be able to deal with it. So far, I'm off to a pretty good start.

Let me tell you how amazingly perfect my birthday has been.

On Thursday night before, BH took me out to one of my favorite swanky restaurants as a make-up for us having to cancel last Saturday night. I ordered wrong from the menu, but other than that, it was a perfectly magnificent dinner.

Yesterday--the acutal Day Of--I took the day off of work. This has become pretty much a tradition for me. I have spent the past few years treating myself to a completely indulgent day on my birthday in order to ease the pain of being one year closer to death. (Bookhart does this too, and we think you should as well. Come ON! You deserve it!)

I have to say that this particular year was one of the best because

a) it was a Friday

b) it was fookin' GORGEOUS outside, which can be extraordinarily rare for those of us with birthdays in January

c) I'm sort of burned out on work at the moment

d) I scheduled and planned it to a tee

Allow me to break it down for you:

8:45 am--My monthly visit from our cleaning service arrives to clean my entire house.

9:00 am--A potato, egg, cheese and jalapeno breakfast taco and a small coke. Breakfast excellence.

9:30 am--An AMAZING facial that included a gylcolic peal and a hydrating hand and foot treatment AND scalp massage.

11:00 am--A very badly needed manicure.

12:40 pm--A small popcorn, a large bottled water, and "Slumdog Millionaire" all by myself

3:00 pm--An hour-long massage

4:20 pm--Checking of the e-mail. Reading of the dozens of sweet birthday wishes on Facebook. Packing of the bag. And a brief rendezvous with BH who was headed out to get his youngest boy for the weekend.

I'm going to pause here to let you in on a little secret about me: I pretty much always keep the fortunes I get in fortune cookies, at least until something that fits the bill of what was predicted in the fortune occurs. Then, I figure it's safe to toss it. It's one of my weird superstitions. Well...Wednesday, Jaye and I went out for some Asian food at lunch, and this was my fortune:

And guess what BH got me for my birthday and gave me on Friday afternoon after I got home from my massage:

BAM!! Can I play it? No. Not really. But I figure, I've got a good ear for music (tone!) and I can type blindly like a mofo (motor skills!), so I can at least have fun with it, no? I am SO freakin' excited, people!! I predict YouTube stardom in a year's time.

Okay, back to the b-day timeline.

5:30 pm--Departure for Dah's house. The Geej was out there (they'd gone out there earlier in the day), and I went to join them for a "girl's night" sleepover. Dah made dinner. Geej acted sweet. I was in bed and asleep by 11:15pm.

11:00 am Saturday--Finally woke up. That's right, bitches. I got to sleep for nearly TWELVE HOURS!! Can you think of a better birthday present than that for me? Because I honestly cannot. Wow. Unbelievably awesome.

12:00pm--Lunch with Dah and The Geej. Then we went here to feed the ducks and fish.

Yes, that's a golf cart crossing the pond. Clearly, it was another gorgeous day.

1:30 pm--I left to go back to Austin. The Geej insisted on staying with Dah. BH and his youngest had gone camping. So I got home to...AN EMPTY, CLEAN, QUIET house. The birthday bliss continues!!

Afternoon--Did three loads of laundry and put it away. Cleaned up all of The Geej's clutter and got her room all organized and straightened up, which is truly saying something.

Evening--Went and got takeout for dinner. Played around on the keyboard. (I LOVE it!!) Watched "The Swell Season" on Austin City Limits. And am now looking forward to a brand new SNL in a little bit.

I know a lot of people choose to have a big blowout on their 40th. And for a while, I even considered it. But I'm SO happy with how gently and peacefully I've entered into this strange new decade of my life. If the past 48 hours have been any barometer of how my mood is going to be for the coming year, then things are going to smooth and happy.

But I STILL cannot believe I'm forty fucking years old. Holy cow.

Ch-ch-ch-changes

Before:

During:

After 5 hours and $300+:

It's subtle, but it's definitely different. I'm no longer a redhead, and after a few more appointments, I'll be a full-tilt blonde.

This is the first of what I hope are many positive changes that will take place this year.

Bring it on, forty!

800th Post!!

And really, it couldn't be more mundane.

This past weekend was fun because it was Geej's gymnastics-themed birthday party featuring 12 wee ones and their parents. I'm happy to say that it was a hit. The kids enjoyed the activities and getting to run around in the a/c jumping and tumbling and whatnot,, and parents enjoyed getting to visit with one another. Other hits besides the actual party itself was the woman hired to make balloon animals and a balloon birthday cake hat (she was AWESOME) and the butterfly shaped cupcake cake from Whole Foods. I'm telling you, when the cake feeding frenzy of little children sets upon you, not having to slice and serve is an added bonus.

That night I got to go for a mini girls' night out with Jaye, Lindsay and my friend Rebecca to see the new production of Mortified. It was all women this time, and two of them were repeats from the November show (disappointing), but there were two women in the show who were fucking hiLARious. Our group of gals got started at Vino Vino, and then went back there after the show. Damn, what a righteous place. Tons of interesting wine, nice light menu offerings, helpful staff and an unpretentious vibe just perfect for chit-chatting.

After MUCH sparkling rose (yes, it's big here too Karla), I almost accepted Lindsay's invitation to partake in some Rock Band, but decided to get my old, tired ass home instead.

Yesterday was spent balancing my checkbook (scary) and signing up for online bill-pay (progressive!). I also washed/vacuumed my car and did a major trip to the grocery store. Typical Sunday fare.

Geej's actual 4th b-day is this Wednesday. Don't worry, she'll have plenty of presents to open on the actual day itself, and she gets to pick where we go for dinner. Knowing her, she'll choose Red Robin, which is actually fine with me.

I guess my other big news is that after my semi-annual trip to the doctor last week, I have been referred to a cardiologist to see to my high blood pressure. It was 170/110 in her office, and yesterday at HEB I took it again, and it was 160/101. Not good, people. I've GOT to figure out a way to deal with my stress and get this damn blood pressure to go down or I'm headed straight to Stroketown, USA.

I'm a chubby, middle-aged, hypertensive stressball. Try not to envy me too much.

Scenes from South By

Wednesday night, I was lucky enough to be the fabulous Mama Malcontent's date (yes, she's still alive, although to swamped with life and such to post) to the Austin Music Awards. We started out at the Dog and Duck for a hearty dinner of fried okra, libations and chatting, and then ventured over to the Music Hall, where this was outside:

(Excuse my dirty lens...I'll clean it.) Loads of media trucks. Wow. This festival is so big, it's freaky.

Our main reason for going to the Music Awards was to see the reunited legendary Texas band, and staple during our high school and early college days--The Judy's--play. I gotta say, I was a little nervous. Would they suck? Would they look scarily old? The answer to both of those questions was a resounding NO.

They were tight as Hell.

They rocked.

They looked great.

They still sounded amazingly fresh and relevant.

And the crowd went wild...

We couldn't help but get up and sing and dance during their set, but after getting told to sit down 3 times by AMH security, it sort of deflated our balloons a bit.

These two old broads DEFINITELY enjoyed the show. And we were home before midnight, thank you very much.

Gregarious. Hilarious. Aquarius.

It's my freakin' birthday. The beginning of the last year of my thirties. Rather than let it get me totally down and slit my wrinkly wrists, I decided to do me some learnin'--YouTube Style! Now, I'd like to share what I learned with you.



If you'd like to get to Aquarius, it's at around 9:30. However, you'd really be missing out not to just watch/listen to the whole thing.

You're welcome.

Can't post. Too tired.

The full 20 year reunion recap post will come tomorrow.

For now, there's this:

BTW: The Pirates' undefeated season ended on Friday. The Henderson Lions whooped 'em.

Ye Olde High School Reunion.

Yep. The big 20 yr.high school reunion is this weekend. Good LORD, how did I get this old? It seems like just yesterday that I was making out with Kyle Gilbreath while wearing my mortar board on graduation night, sitting on the curb in front of my house, drunk as hell. Jesus H. Christ.

And to top it all off, I'm going to my high school reunion with--gasp--a guy I went to high school with!! And I'm in LOVE with him!! I swear to you, truth is much weirder than fiction could ever be.

So our weekend basically looks like this:

Tomorrow, Mr. Wonderful and his boys fly to Dallas. His mom and step-dad live in NW Dallas, so they'll come and pick them up and they'll all go to his mom's house. Meanwhile, Geej, Dah and I will drive to NE Dallas to my Aunt and Uncle's house. The Geej ADORES them...and their dog...and their swimming pool...so she's looking very forward to the trip. After hanging out for a while, I'll leave and go to NW Dallas to rendezvous with Mr. Wonderful, et. al. That's where we'll spend the night.

Friday, Mr. W. and I will drive to Longview. We're staying at his dad's house just outside of town. We're supposed to be going to the high school football game with a bunch of our classmates that night (it's actually an organized reunion activity, including a tailgating party beforehand). I know it sounds dorky, but I'm actually looking forward to this a lot. I was a big ol' band geek through most of high school (French horn/flag corps...it doesn't get much dorkier than that, my friends), and football games were a HUGE part of my life during that time. Plus, there's something quite charming about the whole "Friday Night Lights" thing in small town Texas. There are some planned "activities" after the game, but I have no idea what we we'll end up doing.

Saturday we're just going to hang out. Probably go see some of my (elderly) family. Saturday night we'll be skipping the "gala" part of the reunion, and instead hang out with Mr. W's brother and sister-in-law, something I'm looking very forward to.

Sunday, we'll head back to Dallas where we'll pick up my mom and Geej at my aunt and uncle's house. Then the four of us will head back to Mr. W's mom's house for a late lunch. Then mom, the Geej and I will depart for Austin.

Yes, I'm taking Monday off.

So anyway, I won't be blogging for a few days, but I'm sure I'll have plenty o' photos and tales to tell when I return.
Yes, I was in "Young Repbulicans." Don't hate... It was the Pine Curtain, after all.

Everything hurts.

My hands. My elbows. My knees. And of course, my back.

That's what two consecutive afternoons of flowerbed cleaning out, hardcore weeding, and planting will do to you when you're as old as I am. Jesus, people. The hot (and MUCH needed) shower I took along with the 4 Advil I popped immediately after the yardwork was done have done zilch to keep me from feeling like I got beaten with heavy chains. But damn if everything doesn't look better. I netted two 30 gallon leaf bags filled to capacity with just weeds. That's how nasty-looking my flowerbeds were.

I've still got some plant purchasing and planting to do before I'll feel comfortable enough to share photos with ya'll, but at least I'm getting there.

Three more years 'til 40!

As I type this, I am mere moments away from the clock striking twelve and it officially being January 30th, my birthday. My thirty-fucking-seventh birthday. Yay.

I'm so happy I could cry.

Despite the fact that I had one ROCKIN' ASS party last night (thanks for showing up everyone!! I've got so much wine/booze/beer/cheese left over, that I'm going to have to call an emergency deck sitting/happy hour thing very, very soon), and despite the fact that I'm very, very happy with my current situation in life, this birthday is still hitting me. Hard. Like Coyote-hit-by-an-ACME-anvil hard. Whatever the reason, it's not a date I've been looking forward to. I guess I have no choice but to suck it up and see what lies ahead.

In the meantime, here's a little birthday gift I gave myself earlier today. That shmutz on her face? Guacamole. Leftover party guacamole for dinner. I AM the Mother of the Year.

Let's Party!!

I'm throwing myself a big ass party tonight. Over 60 people have RSVPed. Oh shit. I've got 2 friends in from out o'town who are staying with me, and they're helping me get stuff ready. We're about to go grab lunch then hit the Party Barn to pick up the keg, then the liquor store, then Whole Foods to pick up the catering. I'm telling you--this is real, grown up type shindig. I'm thinking it's going to be pretty damn fun. Oh, and it's also sort of a surprise 60th b-day party for my mom. She doesn't know it, but her brother, sisters and a couple of nieces and nephews are coming in to surprise her. And last night we made this kick ass "This is Your Life" posterboards with a ton of photos of her from throughout her life. She's clueless. I can't wait to see her face!

Anyway, I'm sure I'll do a hungover post tomorrow to dish the dirt. But for now, VIVA LA FIESTA!!

Proof I'm losing my mind...

I forgot the "words" to the ABC song this morning. The ABC Song, people!! I was changing The Geej's diaper and singing along, when all of the sudden I got to the "QRS" section, and forgot what letters came after what. Also, I was unable to add 9 + 8 earlier today. What the hell?

Mom is here visiting. She got here Sunday afternoon. The main reason is to see Geej, of course, but a nice secondary benefit has been that we were able to take my car to be worked on. (Mom put a car seat in her car, which makes things SO much easier.) It was overheating and the A/C was having problems, neither of which you want to deal with during summer in Austin, believe me. So hopefully, this will take care of things for a while.

Yesterday we drove down to Horseshoe Bay to see MOM'S NEW HOUSE. It's about 55 miles west of Austin--a lovely little resort community (read: lots of over-50s folks) right on Lake LBJ. Mom looked at this place in March, and then again in early July. She just loved it, put a bid on it, and I'll be damned if she didn't get it. It's only a couple of years old and is in immaculate condition. And you know how it is when a friend gets a new car, and you ride around in it and it's all super-clean and has that new car smell and all the latest gadgets and whatnot, and then all of the sudden you've got new car fever, and you're looking at the car ads in Saturday's paper and paying close attention to the endless barrage of car commercials that come on while you're watching the 10pm news...? Well, it works the same way when you go see and (almost) new house that's spotless with all the latest appliances and tons of storage and a kick ass floor plan. I've got new house fever in a bad way. But I guess it's just further proof that I'm losing my mind because a) I don't have the money and b) I don't have the time to look/buy/move. I guess I'll just have to live vicariously through my mom as she moves into and decorates this place (and I'm going to have to try like hell to steer her clear of the 1980s decor she's so fond of...).

Another year older and deeper in debt.

Where does that quote come from? I can't recall. It must be because I'm THIRTY FUCKING SIX years old. Officially. As of midnight. Yes, it's true: On this day in 1969, my mom and dad welcomed me, their only child, into this world--all 6 lbs., 9 oz. of me. And the aquarian was set on her path, in the proverbial "Age of Aquarius," as it were. Lucky enough to grow up in a time and place where kids could be kids for a while. When you could ride around on your bike for 8 hours a day, unsupervised and safe, without cellphones or "amber alerts." God that seems like a bazillion years ago.

Happy Birthday to me. Blah blah blah...

So let's check in, shall we?

Lots has been going on since my last post.

Had baby shower #1, hosted by my girlfriends. It kicked total ass. And not only because I totally BANKED on gifts for Miss Geej, but because I felt like everyone who was there really wanted to be there. That meant a lot to me. You know, baby showers can...well..suck. So, a lot of people (including me, usually) approach them with a sense of "let's get this over with as quickly as possible." But my shower was fun. Hey, how often can the expectant mother throw a few back with the guests without risking the health with the baby? At this shower, much wine was drunk, many hugs were exchanged, and lots of gifts were given. It was really cool. My mom was here for baby shower #1 and stayed until baby shower #2, which was a few nights later, and was thrown by my work friends. A smaller turnout, and an overall tamer event, but shower #2 was also really cool. And yes, I got tons of stuff for little sugar pants. So my new challenge is organizing and rearranging in order to make the guest room into a guest room/nursery. Quite a challenge since the house I'm living in was built during an era that didn't appreciate the term "ample storage space." But I'm making progress...slowly. At least it no longer looks like a Babies-R-Us blew up in my living room.

And the "thank you" cards: I'm making progress with those too. I've written 20. I've only got about 30 to go.

Work has cranked back up, full speed. After something of a lull during the holidays, it is crazy-go-nuts time at work, once again. We've hired a new person onto our team, so we'll be bringing her up-to-speed over the next few weeks. And there's just the usual general chaos.

I had car trouble this week: My car was in the shop for 3 days, and I kept having to bum rides off of people. I would rather have a toe removed than deal with car trouble. It's just such a pain in the ass. The reason I took my car in was because my "check engine" light had been going on and off for the past couple of weeks. But while the car was there, I asked them about replacing one of my reverse taillights, which had recently burned out. $47 DOLLARS!!!! That's' what those bastards wanted to charge me...to CHANGE A LIGHT BULB. Can you believe that? Of course, I told them no. And I actually asked the guy on the phone giving me the $47 quote if he got embarrassed having to call people and tell them that the business he works for charges this ridiculous amount. He said, "I just read the quotes, ma'am." Ugh. I guess my job isn't that bad.

My mom got sick while she was here. Some kind of allergies/chest/head cold sort of thing. She was hating it. And Thursday, when she woke up, she had 101-degree fever. And it was raining outside. And it was her birthday. Sucks, no? I begged her to stay here and let me take care of her rather than driving home in the rain with a clogged up head, but she left anyway. Hardheaded...

And then I got whatever she had. Yay!! Yesterday, I felt like hell. Coughing. Banging headache. Sneezing. Watery eyes. Achy. Clogged up ears. General misery. I'm coming out of it, but still...what a crummy way to spend your birthday.

So I'm going to sign off...my first post as a 36 year old. Yikes. I don't know how I'm going to get used to the idea of being in my "late thirties." God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...