Monday, February 22, 2010

N-word = C-word

Got the news late this afternoon: this is my diagnosis. Doctor wants to remove the whole thyroid due to the other little n-words hanging out along with the largest n-word. Surgery will probably be scheduled within the next two weeks. After it is removed, my care will be handed over to an endocrinologist who will put me on synthetic hormones for the rest of my life.

I'm not afraid of the cancer. It's super treatable and my prognosis is excellent. I am, however afraid of the utter depletion of my paid time off account (into which I am due to receive a nice disbursement on my 3/5 paycheck, but it'll be mostly wiped out because of my surgery and recuperation time). And I'm also pretty fucking terrified--phobic, actually--of being in the hospital and getting a post-surgical infection. Been there, done that. Every time I think about actually having to go in there and under the knife, I can feel my blood pressure rise and my ears start to burn and ring like I'm going to pass out. As a matter of fact, I'm going to quit typing about it.

So, yeah. I've got some major schedule adjustment to do in the coming weeks in order to figure out when all this shiz is going to go down.

All I can say right now, is thank God I had vertigo bad enough to send me to the ENT. Otherwise, who knows when (or if) this thing would've been caught.

10 comments:

Hecticmom Undone said...

Yikes!

That's all I can say is Yikes! Sending virtual hugs your way!

Badger said...

Shit, dude! I am so sorry. Thank God it's treatable and the prognosis is good. Sending good thoughts your way -- let me know if there's anything I can do.

hotpinksox said...

Cancer sucks! I'm sorry. I'm glad to know that you will be ok after they remove that N-word. Sending you good thoughts and lots of love.

Martin N said...

Awww Marla. I am sorry to hear this. Hope your recovery is swift. Love, Marty

Karla said...

fuck fuck fuck fuck. I was worried this was the case but was hoping against hope it wasn't.
And screw your workplace for their pecuniary time off policy. That is really just extra stress that you don't need.
OK, I know the prognosis is good but that doesn't stop me worrying and crying for you. Damnit. I send you a big hug.

Anonymous said...

Quit it with all this big C-shit Karla May! Don't make me get my bedside manner on again! You've kicked ass before and you will do so again. LOVE YOU!

Michelle Schwegmann said...

dear lord. why you? honey i am so sorry. for chrissakes. xoxooxox we love you so much.

Unknown said...

I hope you saw the note I sent you privately but I have to leave a comment because my word verification is:

testictr

Now go kick that cancer's ass.

Emily said...

What the fuck? I've been choosing to believe that you can only get one kind of cancer, and once you get that, you're done. So fuck. I love you. I'm good at hanging out in doctor's offices, hospitals, bars, etc. Let me know what I can do.
Oh, and I LOVE my new oncologist. Love. Her. So let me know....
My word verification? Herin. Very close to what I think we might all be driven to.....

SUS said...

Hey, if you have any questions about Synthroid, I can tell you what I know after being on it for 3 years. Sure, it's a PITA to take a pill every day for the rest of my life, but it ain't too bad. And Synthroid is cheap.