tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-87817302012-02-03T12:51:26.963-06:00I have escaped from behind the fabled Pine Curtain of northeast Texas. I have learned much. Here is my tale...Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.comBlogger11441100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-52852779351706838062012-01-31T22:55:00.000-06:002012-01-31T22:55:00.831-06:00

I refuse to call this a bucket list, despite the fact that yesterday was my 43rd (FORTYFUCKINGTHIRD!!) birthday. These are simply things that I hope to do...at some point...in no particular order...before I croak. Perform a stand-up comedy set--THAT KILLS--in front of a live audience. Snorkel in a coral reef. Hold a baby sloth. Go to a silent meditation retreat. See an opera. Attend an SNL

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-27164271972646949362012-01-16T14:06:00.000-06:002012-01-16T14:06:16.860-06:00

Ice skated. (Busted my ass on the ice.) Tried coconut water. (Didn't enjoy it.) Ate treats cooked in an Easybake Oven. (Not so good.) Put a TON of old grad school stuff in the recycle bin. (Yes, I still had papers and stuff from grad school. Shut up.) Tried not one, but two new restaurants within walking distance of our house. (Both were delicious!!) Found a couch I want at Crate & Barrel that's

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-84115071636986918822012-01-13T09:58:00.000-06:002012-01-13T09:58:35.198-06:00

Last weekend, while considering her reflection in the full-length mirror in my bathroom, The Geej asked me innocently, "Am I skinny, Mommy?" The Geej who has yet to reach 50 lbs. The Geej who wears size 7 super skinny jeans that have their adjustable waistbands taken all the way in so that they'll stay on her body. The Geej who is almost always cold because she has zero body fat. The Geej who

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-67839612335286503902012-01-05T09:49:00.000-06:002012-01-05T09:49:05.088-06:00

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-90144547639932425812011-12-23T10:28:00.001-06:002011-12-24T11:01:48.951-06:00

Monday was the anniversary of my dad's death. Nine years ago. Stomach cancer. I hadn't really thought about the significance of the date until I was sitting in traffic on my way to work. It was raining and gloomy, and I was listening to my iPod on random shuffle. That period of time when I'm in my car by myself, going to or from work, is really the only regular time I get to listen to whatever I

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-71466652012359303402011-12-20T16:46:00.000-06:002011-12-20T16:46:30.159-06:00

It's probably no surprise to anyone who's spent any time at all with this blog that I am a complete nut for cute animals. And baby animals? Fuggitabout it. Total sucker. So imagine my utter delight when, last week, I learned that a show about bebeh sloths was going to debut on Animal Planet. That's right: Bebeh freakin' sloths. Here's the trailer: SEE?!! Couldn't you just DIE?! I set my

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-84555958623170643552011-12-13T13:27:00.001-06:002011-12-13T13:30:13.438-06:00

Follow-up to my original "Recent Discoveries" post, which wasn't really all that original. Popcorn, Indiana's Wasabi popcorn. Seriously. Just go get some. I actually like just regular old hummus way better than fancy alternately flavored hummus (ex. roasted red pepper). Those new tires that I paid an assload for last month may have actually been worth it. It's been raining some here recently

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-8022382569285964402011-12-08T12:00:00.000-06:002011-12-08T12:00:51.070-06:00

I once had a roommate who was pretty, smart, and successful. However, her self-esteem was almost non-existent. She would date a guy, he would treat her like shit, she would believe she actually WAS shit and deserved to be treated as such, and eventually she'd get her heart broken and go into a major depression. The next guy she would date would be exactly like the previous asshole who'd

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-38716343331195323282011-12-05T15:07:00.003-06:002011-12-05T16:08:04.628-06:00

A few weeks ago, The Geej was playing one of those "virtual dress up" games on our computer. You know what I'm talking about: there's a generic male or female figure and you get to choose their clothes, accessories, hair, make-up, etc. Well, she LOVES these little games and plays them whenever she's allowed on to the computer. So I go in to check on her progress, and I notice that the figure

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-62901158680576132832011-11-23T09:06:00.000-06:002011-11-23T09:06:06.221-06:00

The first one away from family. In Chicago. I made my mom's cornbread dressing and took it to a big potluck hosted by some dudes living in a crazy house in Pilsen. The dressing was unevenly cooked--done around the edges, mushy in the middle. My boyfriend tooke a mincemeat pie from the grocery store. We all drank a lot, got loud, and had a blast. The right after my stepdad had been moved from

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-15415472297902045362011-11-17T11:40:00.000-06:002011-11-17T11:40:27.997-06:00

Yes, it's been actual weeks since my last post. Believe me, I wish I'd had the time and inspiration to create some posts, but both of those things have been sadly absent from my life. And now I'm sick. Sort of. I mean, I'm not sure what's up. I'm blaming allergies, but basically it's a feeling of general-worn-outedness (more so than normal), banging hangover-like headaches, and the rawest, sorest

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-20751737837514647802011-10-26T09:20:00.000-05:002011-10-26T09:20:25.427-05:00

When I had the fall parent/teacher conference with GJ's teacher (who I really like now, by the way), she told me that they're learning about communities and cities and government--just the basic stuff. But how they're doing it is she had the class found their city by naming it and drawing up a city charter that they all signed. This city, named M&M City (how 'bout that product placement, Mars,

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-23446444005550505332011-10-21T13:32:00.001-05:002011-10-21T14:00:22.368-05:00

My father was the youngest of 5 born into a very strict Pentecostal family. He once told me that, by the time he was 15, he'd attended enough church to last him the rest of his life, so he stopped going--much to the chagrin of his deacon father. My mother was raised in a Methodist household that attended church during major religious holidays, but not much during the rest of the year. Neither of

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-43475361385123328372011-10-18T12:24:00.000-05:002011-10-18T12:24:38.485-05:00

Twelve. Today is my 12th anniversary working for you-know-who. Wow. When I started this job I was a lot younger, skinnier, and blonder. I was also a lot less bruised by life. I had more energy but less stress. I drove a Mitsubishi that was 1/2 way paid for. I'd just moved back to Austin after being gone for five years, and lived in a rented house with horrible carpet and a man I would marry and

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-80495506765133701742011-10-15T10:20:00.001-05:002011-10-15T10:21:55.595-05:00

*A post idea blatantly stolen from my girl, Kathy. In my quest to eat somewhat healthier, I got adventurous and tried a new smoothie at Whole Foods. It sounds disgusting--kale, coconut water, ginger, mango, strawberries--and is the color of baby diarrhea, but it's actually good! And I fucking HATE kale. Quaker mini rice cakes, salt and pepper flavor. Although I don't drink coffee, I am most

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-891855363997582662011-10-13T17:18:00.000-05:002011-10-13T17:18:00.145-05:00

I got a new computer at work yesterday. Normally, this would be something I would be dancing a happy jig about this. But thus far, I am not very happy with the whole switching-over-to-the-new-system bullshiz. Yes, I know I'm old and shit. And I don't "get it" as quickly or as easily as most of The Kids these days. But OMG, I've been having to mess with this whole pile o' crap almost all day today

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-65240085831555735442011-10-11T09:17:00.000-05:002011-10-11T09:17:57.154-05:00

Feeling a little schizo because of travel and work and work and work. So much to say. Sneaking time now before the first of two all-day meetings to blog. It feels almost criminal. Some glimpses from the past few weeks: Walking toward my gate at BWI, I hear applause begin behind me. Then build. I turn around and see dozens of WWII and Korean War vets--most being wheeled in wheelchairs, some 

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-80544078689135875392011-09-30T09:24:00.002-05:002011-09-30T09:28:19.549-05:00

So today's payday. For me that means that I spend about 15 minutes online, paying bills and whatnot. As part of that process, I logged on to my credit card's website to see what my balance was so that I could schedule a payment. When I did so, I noticed a charge that I did not make or authorize. I also noticed that, right next to the charges listed, there was an option that said, "Have questions

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-37859106245339830082011-09-27T13:03:00.000-05:002011-09-27T13:03:48.645-05:00

I really WANT to write a big ol' long post about the cool trip to Washington, D.C. I just took with a friend and all of the fun stuff we got to do and see and all of the WONDERFUL food we got to eat and how we saw real, honest-to-goodness rain while we were there and how traveling well together is an art form and how much the D.C. Metro system made me long for something useful and practical like

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-19540360742130414002011-09-20T14:17:00.001-05:002011-09-21T11:06:53.393-05:00

A quicky while I've still got a few minutes left on this crappy airport wi-fi. The Geej has long enjoyed role-playing type play. She's had a variety of characters in the past--Lisa, Karla, and some mysterious creature named Norway come to mind. However, they were always just variations on a theme. Each one was an older "Mommy" character who (surprise!) worked where I work, was married to Daschel

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-23274510886368049272011-09-15T13:05:00.002-05:002011-09-15T16:12:12.937-05:00

I was lying awake last night thinking about next week's fast-approaching craziness--flying to/from Oklahoma City for work on Tuesday/Wednesday and then to Washington D.C. for a fun girls trip on Thursday - Sunday. Why D.C., you ask? Well, several reasons. But the BIGGEST reason is that I have tickets to this band, who I absolutely adore and have never seen live: They play huge stadiums in

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-4115035893270931552011-09-12T13:53:00.000-05:002011-09-12T13:53:36.279-05:00

When I was in college, my best friend warned me not to hook up with this guy we'll call "Keith" because, as best as I can recall, I've never actually hooked up with anyone named Keith. Anyhoo, I was sort of gah-gah about him becuase he was freakin' gorgeous and sexy and flirty. Dumb as a brick, but still... But my friend knew him from her hometown. She knew what a dick he was and how he treated

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-73452678935131428052011-09-05T10:30:00.000-05:002011-09-05T10:30:43.710-05:00

Handwritten note in a small spiral notebook. Panic attack on a plane. 9-15-04 parched mouth & throat; dry lips inability to speak like a large hand is wrapped around my torso--armpits to pelvis--slowly tightening its grip sweaty palms stiff all over; petrified constant loop of panicky thoughts running in head hot lava feeling in torso, back of neck, ears gritting teeth alternating w/

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-50634990347985945262011-09-02T21:50:00.001-05:002011-09-02T22:40:47.075-05:00

Have y'all seen this commercial? Go ahead and watch it because it'll make the rest of this little story funnier, and I know you like the comedy. I'll wait right here. Ever since we've been letting our cat Doug outside, our night time routine more or less looks like this: Go to bed with all animals in house. Fall asleep. Get woken up at some point during the night by Doug meowing and/or

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-104301418317488122011-09-02T15:25:00.000-05:002011-09-02T15:25:13.832-05:00

I know I've bitched about the heat and drought and whatnot, so I promise not to do that in this post. In fact, if you wanna read some really well-crafted weather-bitching, then I'd urge you to check out this fine blog by fellow Austinite and heat-sufferer, Kathy. Even though the weather hasn't changed one little bit, I'm so effing happy that August is dunzo that I feel like dancing a very

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-45521156530988018882011-08-25T09:41:00.000-05:002011-08-25T09:41:34.781-05:00

The principal at GJ's school sent me back a very thoughtful email. She offered some really valuable perspective and had some good suggestions, including letting GJ talk with the school counselor so that she knows she's being heard--by a grown up--at school. GJ's report from her day yesterday was somewhat better, and some of her spunk has returned. She tackled her homework with gusto and even

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-81504572799076569562011-08-24T11:45:00.002-05:002011-08-24T12:49:36.503-05:00

First up, thanks for your comments and concern. I just sent this message to GJ's principal (identifiers redacted). We'll see what comes of it: Hello Ms. PRINCIPAL, First off, congrats on ELEMENTARY SCHOOL's recent "Exemplary" rating. I know how hard all of the teachers and students worked to acheive this recognition. Second, I wanted to let you know about some concerns I have about my

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-37567647176497068482011-08-22T21:54:00.001-05:002011-08-22T22:41:23.595-05:00

I never struggled academically in school. I got--and enjoyed--everything that was thrown at me. I thrived. That is, until 9th grade algebra. Something about the theoretical nature of it all--it's utter abstractness--didn't click in my brain. Plus, it just seemed so fucking pointless to me. Who GAVE a shit if X equaled Y? My teacher that year didn't really care about teaching so much as she cared

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-59998579031709987602011-08-18T12:09:00.000-05:002011-08-18T12:09:00.454-05:00

To get behind the old lady writing a check and trying to use 49 coupons and a raincheck at the grocery store than behind someone who actually has shit to do and wants to get the FUCK outta there. To lie awake with my mind racing after my 4:48am trip to the bathroom than actually fall back to sleep. To yell "Come ON, Granpaw!" at you if you're going 32 mph in a 45 mph zone than to think, "It's

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-85572623497127645652011-08-11T23:56:00.001-05:002011-08-12T13:07:59.660-05:00

Not only is he one of the skaters featured in this video, he also helped film it. He is fearless and talented and kind and funny, and he's only 11 1/2 years old. He is a badass, and I adore him. Summer Skatepark Sessions from Greg Melish on Vimeo.

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-61836156972078418652011-08-05T12:03:00.000-05:002011-08-05T12:03:51.795-05:00

Last night's dream contained the following elements: Wardrobe:  Sweeney Todd, which I have not actually seen. Water skiing Severed toe (not mine) Set: HBO's Carnivale, however we were actually in Miami Melanie from "So You Think You Can Dance" My friend Thelma Jane Karaoke What the HELL, people?! I'm blaming this extreme weirdness of this dream on a combo of the heat and the fact that I saw a

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-30538281578996691392011-08-01T17:21:00.002-05:002011-08-11T23:53:00.450-05:00

I remembered on my way downstairs at work this morning that The Geej used to love playing on my bed when she was a baby. For some unknown reason, the memory just leaped into my brain, immediate and vivid. About 11 months old, she would gleefully throw her tiny body around on the bed for long stretches of time, knowing that either I or the soft mattress and pillows would catch her. Her huge open

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-24090253439469260022011-07-28T16:41:00.000-05:002011-07-28T16:41:23.297-05:00

Yes, it has been hot here in Austin. Horribly horribly hot, reltentlessly sweltering, and so so SO dry. But right now, out in the Gulf of Mexico, there is a storm named Don a-brewin'. And as of earlier today, this was Don's projected path: If there is a God, and if that God doesn't hate Texas, we will be getting some rain from this storm and maybe, just maybe, a day or two where it DOESN'T get

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-64780161419245794442011-07-27T13:40:00.000-05:002011-07-27T13:40:12.338-05:00

Last night, I was diagnosed. Bone cancer. The prognosis wasn't good. I started chemo right away. My hair began to fall out. I considered short haircuts to ease the progression to full-on baldness. Two friends from my writing workshop were there. A friend from work. My mother. The treatment center was located on lovely green grounds, but the interior was bleak--filled with the sick and the dying

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-16807625203677382192011-07-27T08:58:00.000-05:002011-07-27T08:58:38.138-05:00

Haven't written a word since I got back. Utterly uninspired. The heat. Work. The day-to-day drudgery of it all. Reading a really good memoir and trying to seek inspiration from that. Went to see a movie and my writing workshop brain was troubled by how poor the storytelling was. Forgot how much The Geej talks. It is constant and relentless. Dreading August more than usual. Dreamed I got furious

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-10509152388983649512011-07-20T14:57:00.000-05:002011-07-20T14:57:42.137-05:00

Let's say it's a glorious day in July. Warm, but not too hot. Not a cloud in the sky. Let's say there's a street fair. It's big. Tens of thousands of people are attending. It stretches on for blocks with artists and food and music and people, people, people. Let's say it was a long, wet, dreary spring. Longer and wetter than it ususally is. Even in Portland, Oregon. And let's say, there's a

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-21879030650949011432011-07-18T09:28:00.001-05:002011-07-18T09:29:14.599-05:00

Things I haven't done in over a week: Cooked Loaded/Unloaded Dishwasher Kissed husband Driven car Eaten Tex-Mex or tater tots Shaved legs Watched TV Hugged kid (mine) Slept with windows closed Played fetch with cats Drunk bubble water (La Croix, or similar) Scooped cat litter Worried to excess Done other people's laundry Petted dog belly (my dog) Gotten angry Checked internet gossip sites Felt

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-79014330778989666182011-07-16T23:58:00.001-05:002011-07-17T02:27:29.870-05:00

I am wondering if I should even attempt to write this post now. Right now, while the big end-of-conference Dance Party rages on in the Student Union building outside my windows, I am busy packing. Yes, I went to the party for a while, but I knew when it was time to leave (a gift of insight that comes to you in your 40s, I believe). It will take me a while to process all that this week has meant

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-14717964983488163732011-07-15T23:58:00.000-05:002011-07-16T02:28:36.377-05:00

My brain is full to flooding. I am done with the hipsters. I love being able to hear the train from my dorm room windows. Clove cigarettes are stupid as fuck. To the people who stamp out and leave their cigarette butts in the middle of this amazingly gorgeous green lawn that it takes a team of DOZENS of humanfuckingbeings to maintain: You should have to sit down and eat every cigarette butt you

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-59018443061550799092011-07-14T22:39:00.001-05:002011-07-17T02:30:45.703-05:00

This one's gonna be a short one because I'm tired, I've had some wine, and I've got to do some reading before I go to bed (which will happen shortly, I hope). However, a techno dance party with some really loud and very bass-heavy music started about 10 minutes ago in the Student Union that's only a tennis ball's throw away from my open windows. And I'm a girl, so I don't throw very far. Good

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-59972434937091609212011-07-13T23:48:00.003-05:002011-07-14T00:09:47.740-05:00

I am exhausted. Not because of any sort of physical exertion, mind you. But I have gone from lecture to workshop to lecture to event all day long, and I've been mentally engaged and zooming with ideas and energy since I opened my eyes this morning, and that creates its own kind of tiredness--the kind where you want to just stare at a blank wall and drool for a while. But instead, I'm keeping my "

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-45436092972740862302011-07-13T21:20:00.001-05:002011-07-13T21:21:19.744-05:00

Michelle picked me up right on time. The sky had cleared and it was absolutely perfect outside. We rode to dinner at a fancy schmancy vegan restaurant with the car windows rolled down. We took our time with dinner, not wanting to rush just because of the 8:00pm show start time on the tickets, figuring that Gillian Welch would have an opening band anyway. We started with this incredibly flavorful

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-9592409497306385632011-07-12T20:04:00.000-05:002011-07-12T20:04:45.632-05:00

I ordered a fan for my room from Campus Services, it made a huge difference in the depth and quality of my sleep last night. I woke up around 5:30 to pee, and it was actually chilly in my room. When I returned to bed after my trip to the bathroom, I heard a faint, unfamiliar sound outside my open windows: soft, steady rain. I drifted back to sleep in complete relaxed peace. It wasn't raining

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-84763246788570931622011-07-11T23:15:00.001-05:002011-07-12T19:47:26.894-05:00

Surprisingly, despite the open windows and the strange, too-firm bed, and the lack of white noise I so love ceiling fans for, I managed to get a pretty decent night's sleep last night. I think the relief of finally, finally actually being here after thinking about it for so long played a part in my easy rest. I'm also going to credit that one Tylenol P.M. for making my trip to sleepytime a bit

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1Portland, OR, USA45.5234515 -122.676207145.412436 -122.8587801 45.634467 -122.4936341tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-87859452148789241452011-07-10T23:05:00.000-05:002011-07-11T01:06:57.316-05:00

Holy crap. I'm here. It's still a bit surreal. I feel like I'm in some sort of magical fairy land of amazingness, and I keep wondering, "How the HELL did I get here?" First up, I've been in Portland since Friday night. I have been spending a couple of wonderful days with two of my favorite people on the planet--Josh and Michelle, or as I like to think of them, Joshelle--and their utterly

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-77385993714550822092011-06-28T15:24:00.000-05:002011-06-28T15:24:03.766-05:00

I've long had a complicated relationship with where I come from. Northeast Texas is somehow laid back and uptight at the same time. It's steeped in--and sometimes paralyzed by--its own tradition and history. The small towns that dot the landscape are utterly charming to me, but also stifling and depressing. It's where some of my best memories were made, but I have no desire to return there in

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-24947999416462155332011-06-19T23:58:00.001-05:002011-06-20T13:34:47.600-05:00

When I made up my mind to adopt The Geej, I was single and absolutely 100% believed I would remain that way. It wasn't that I'd "given up," per se. It was more like I'd come to terms with the fact that by entering this new and very intense relationship with my child, the liklihood of me having time or mental energy to focus on developing a relationship with a man was very, very slim. I'd been

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-84299017507185480422011-06-08T15:57:00.001-05:002011-06-08T23:44:07.865-05:00

1. In middle school, I received a perm at the J.C. Penney salon in the Longview Mall that not only left me with a huge, blonde Annie-type afro, it also gave me chemical burns on the back of my neck that prohibited me from wearing collars and/or sleeping on my back for at least a week. 2. I slept with Neosporin and a Band-Aid on my face last night. Why? Because the big, huge zit I have on my

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-68276131692704558282011-06-06T16:33:00.000-05:002011-06-06T16:33:28.348-05:00

“A woman must have money and a room of her own if she is to write.”--Virgina Woolf This is a very well-known quote from a very famous writer. The reason I'm starting with this is because I am one big fat ball of frustration at the moment and can relate to this quote like nobody's business. Let me start off with the good stuff: I submitted my writtng assignment for the workshop I'm attending in

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-33971294639507387962011-05-20T14:51:00.000-05:002011-05-20T14:51:34.168-05:00

I've been a total nutcase lately, including back-to-back, coast-to-coast trips for work. And now I'm eyeballs deep in post-production work on a video we're creating at work AND I'm trying to find the time and energy to get my manuscript in condition to send off to the Big Summer Writing Workshop. Oh, and The Geej is about to be finished with first grade and The Rapture is upon us. In a way, not

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-84586978862358281702011-04-08T16:12:00.000-05:002011-04-08T16:12:28.437-05:00

The Walgreens near my house has two drive through lanes. The other day, I was waiting for a prescription refill at Lane 2, when a red Kia Soul pulled up and in to Lane 1. Its windows were all down (as were mine--it was gorgeous outside) and the song "Funkytown" was blaring out of the stereo. As the car approached the drive through window, the song was turned off by the dad driving. However, the

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-89173728970944173312011-04-06T05:56:00.000-05:002011-04-06T05:56:53.680-05:00

Almost immediately after I clicked "Publish Post" last week, I got up to check on my cat Doug becuase he was scratching himself. A lot. It was annoying, and I wanted to check him up close to ensure he wasn't bringing fleas into the house. What I discovered was a large, abscessed puncture wound in his side that he was scratching and licking. It was fucking gross, y'all. I immediately thought three

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-90059909445181001912011-03-30T06:13:00.001-05:002011-03-30T06:18:36.529-05:00

Been dealing with a dear friend's serious illness and hospitalization for the past couple of weeks. Her situation is serious and chronic and it breaks my heart. I fear for her and her family. I am hopeful but scared. I want everything to be "normal" again but don't now if it ever will be. During her hospitalization, I've been amazed by our close group of female friends. How they've all stepped up

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-69507981439192595082011-03-22T13:43:00.001-05:002011-03-22T14:11:49.883-05:00

Yes, it's lunch time.That means I'll be shoving food into my pie hole in between sentences. Feel free to imagine that lovliness if you'd like to. Spring break has come and gone. And for those of us in Austin, that means that the craziness that is South-by-Southwest has also drawn to a close. Once again this year I managed to miss out on all things SXSW except for the traffic and close encounters

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-41583499775999659072011-03-16T19:42:00.001-05:002011-03-30T06:15:27.790-05:00

Right after 9-11, I was like a lot of Americans: obsessed with watching/listening to the news, unable to sleep, terrified of what was next (because there just had to be SOMETHING to follow up that horrible tragedy). And now, for the first time since then, I'm feeling that way again. The ever-worsening situation in Japan and the noble way with which that country's citizenry are handling it (at

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-19495681491094805052011-03-08T11:35:00.000-06:002011-03-08T11:35:07.203-06:00

Instagr.am. It's a photo taking/sharing app on the iPhone, and it is SO cool. I'm following people in Amsterdam, Russia, Korea, Japan and India (among some other home-grown folks). It's amazing how compelling and fun simple, everyday photos can be. The dark circles under my eyes. Dudes. They're BAD. And I've noticed that in every single photo that's been taken of me in the past year or so, they

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-64347128536723699762011-03-01T15:45:00.000-06:002011-03-01T15:45:30.726-06:00

I've just applied to two different summer writing workshops. One application, I submitted online last night. But then, I started messing with (read: improving) my submission piece. And so the second application (which I put in the mail today) had a tighter, more compelling version of what I sent last night.  So we'll see. One's in Oregon the other's in Vermont. The Oregon workshop says they'll

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-5291155321786234102011-02-21T22:29:00.002-06:002011-02-21T22:41:12.188-06:00

I hardly ever write a post that is really just to get you to look at someone else's post. But that's what I'm doing today. Why? Well, the person who wrote the post is near and dear to me (The Texpatriate). And also, she very clearly captures and articulates the lightning-in-a-bottle fury that many of us--including me--are feeling as the Republican leaders in our country, and especially in

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-66515975832720105372011-02-20T10:09:00.000-06:002011-02-20T10:09:35.962-06:00

Within a couple of hours of writing the post about Doug hauling ass, prison-break style, he was back at home snoozing with a full belly. He'd been spotted in some bushes in front of a house on the street behind us. When he saw us, he skeedaddled into a back yard and got tormented by some bluejays and mockingbirds for a while. Then, once it started steadily drizzling, he decided to scale the fence

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-7677139966643373352011-02-19T08:07:00.000-06:002011-02-19T08:07:03.405-06:00

You wanna know how sick I was this week? Remember a few posts ago when I said it was my 2000th post? Yeah...it was my 1,000th. My feverish brain got way confused. So for those of you keeping score at home, I apologize.

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-59975831286463970742011-02-19T08:02:00.000-06:002011-02-19T08:02:18.247-06:00

"But why are you up and blogging at such an early hour on a Saturday, Karla May?" Well, that's a very good question. The Geej is at Dah's house (yesterday was a school holiday, so she had a sleepover), it quiet and cloudy, and I love to sleep. And yet, I'm awake. You see, the stupider of our two cats, Doug, has been jonesing for the outdoors. So much so that we experimented with taking him out

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-36947969124318769342011-02-18T22:06:00.000-06:002011-02-18T22:06:09.512-06:00

Well, not exactly. But I'm in a much better place than I was when I last wrote. Today, I finally went back to work after being out sick for four freakin' days. I am SO unbelievably behind, but it was really good to be back among the living today, however minimal my "To Do" list progress may have been. Monday and Tuesday sucked donkey balls. I was so miserable and feverish and achy and worn out.

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-54659253296492873582011-02-14T19:01:00.000-06:002011-02-14T19:01:28.512-06:00

My mom's getting married this evening. They were going to do it on April 16th (and are still planning on having a big party to celebrate on that date), but decided to go ahead and take the plunge on Valentine's Day. She notified me of this new plan last Friday, and I was planning to attend but...I'VE GOT THE GODDAMNED FLU. It started on Saturday night--that vague, annoying tickle in the back of

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-41481847045489729362011-02-12T19:55:00.000-06:002011-02-12T19:55:33.745-06:00

Characters: Big Sister, Age 5-ish Little Sister, Sarah: Age 3-ish Scene: The ladies room of Academy Sports and Outdoors. Big Sister is washing her hands. Little sister is in the stall next to Karla May. The father of both girls is waiting for them outside the restroom. Big Sister: Hurry up! Little Sister: I can't! I'm pooooooooooooooping! Big Sister: I'm done already! (Pause) Little Sister:

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-2818767668819811532011-02-09T20:34:00.000-06:002011-02-09T20:34:14.339-06:00

A few weeks ago, I bought The Geej this little packet of safety equipment to complement the roller skates Santa brought her for Christmas. It came with knee pads, elbow pads, and gloves. Fingerless light blue gloves with pink flowers on them. That evening, she put the gloves on and commented about how cool they were and how they made her look "at least ten years old". Well, now she sports one

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-90813630208660932422011-02-08T16:06:00.001-06:002011-02-08T16:07:47.369-06:00

Y'all, I cannot focus for shit. I'm sitting here at work, and I have a shit ton of stuff I need to be doing, but I simply can't get my mind to sit still long enough to accomplish anything. I'm blaming this state on several different factors: 1. I'm having holy-shit-I'm-back-from-vacation syndrome. The world didn't stop spinning while I was out of the office. Au contraire: I have a bunch more

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-70127132970789487482011-02-06T19:16:00.000-06:002011-02-06T19:16:26.074-06:00

Our little casita. On 20 seculded acres. Heaven. The sunset as seen off the side porch. We didn't get as much "porch time" as we'd hoped for due to the cold temperatures and brisk winds. Next time... "The Window" in Big Bend National Park. Perfect weather. Amazing view. The Rio Grande. What you see across the river is Boquillos, Mexico.

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-58824866087893054642011-02-05T12:12:00.001-06:002011-02-05T12:13:03.495-06:00

Maybe it's because it is so drastically different from all things Pine Curtain in its geography, humidity, and vegetation. Maybe it's because of the utter solitude it can afford. Or maybe it's just because it is, literally, hundreds and hundreds of miles away from what is my normal day-to-day, but man, I love the desert. As you start driving south and west from Austin, the landscape begins to

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-26611539249591086322011-02-03T06:14:00.000-06:002011-02-03T06:14:00.658-06:00

So please excuse me if I ramble more than usual. In case you've been ensconced in a climate controlled lair, several miles beneath the surface of the Earth, then you probably know that we're in the midst of a "Weather Event" here in the ol' U. S. of A. I mean, as winter storms go, this one seems pretty epic and insanely widespread. Yesterday, while more than a thousand cars got stranded on

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-1652194869137020512011-01-29T00:39:00.003-06:002011-01-29T09:31:16.411-06:00

I'm blurry on the exact dates, so forgive me. I was in Jr. High, and I loved Van Halen. They were touring and were coming to play in Shreveport, LA, which is about 60 miles from my home town. I wanted to go, and I had a friend named Traci who had an older (driving) brother who was going to the show. Somehow we convinced our mothers that it would be a good idea if her beer-slamming, weed-smoking,

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-21126491772612300782011-01-24T17:08:00.002-06:002011-01-26T10:53:56.899-06:00

My work trip to Ft. Lauderdale (Pompano Beach, actually) went really well. I saw the inside of a drab conference room during most of my time there, but hey--I was there for work, after all. However, we did go to a big group dinner at this insane tiki bar/restaurant place called Mai Kai. When I first learned about this place, I was worried that it was some ghastly theme restaurant (ex: Rain Forest

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-69594393811900738172011-01-14T13:40:00.001-06:002011-01-16T14:10:06.378-06:00

This is going to be one of those all-over-the-map posts because I have nothing and everything to talk about. I have about a gagillion songs in my iTunes. I am a music hoarder. It is my one regular financial indulgence. And having all of that wonderful stuff at my fingertips is a great source of joy to me. So, several months ago, I decided to make a playlist out of all of the songs in my iTunes

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-41913864343966623542011-01-09T22:34:00.000-06:002011-01-09T22:34:54.028-06:00

I was lucky enough to be able to surprise my friend with a "Kick Ass" award tonight. Yes, it's a real thing. With a trophy and everything! Here was her nomination: As we live our lives, we each experience regular, lower-case “days”. We go to work. We grocery shop. We send some emails. We eat a sandwich. We hang out with our families. We do the stuff and have the somewhat unremarkable, rather

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-13159358314001656032011-01-08T21:06:00.002-06:002011-01-09T08:29:50.332-06:00

FYI: I gave The Geej the 5 min. "Greek Mythologies for Dummies" lessons that one needs to fully appreciate the premise of Xanadu just prior to us starting the movie. And then I told her there would be, "lots of music and magic and roller skating." And then, that shit was ON!! What follows are the questions and conversations that happened during the movie. If you don't know Xanadu like I do, this

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-3119149739066130132011-01-07T10:07:00.000-06:002011-01-07T10:07:40.816-06:00

You know how it feels when you're inspired and "in the zone" and you're mental wheels are really turning and you feel like you're being listened to and maybe, just maybe, having a positive impact? Well, it's been a long time since I've felt this way at work, which has been hard for me. But over the past couple of weeks, that has started to change. I feel like I'm beginning to get my professional

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-11718650530630700382011-01-01T17:55:00.000-06:002011-01-01T17:55:15.208-06:00

2010 is in the books. 2011 begins. Christmas was calm and lovely. The Geej woke up super early Christmas Day to find pretty much everything she'd asked for (except that Moxie Girl crap) had been left by one Mr. S. Claus. She got the iPod Touch (Santa found a pre-owned, 2nd generation model and got if for a bargain), and has barely put it down since. Dah and her man came over Christmas morning

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-29315165317080909052010-12-24T16:38:00.000-06:002010-12-24T16:38:11.184-06:00

The enchilada soup is in the crockpot. The laundry is done. The drizzle is falling and so is the temperature. The breakfast casserole is in the fridge, setting overnight for breakfast in the morning. The kitchen has been cleaned. Dishes washed and put away. Last minute gifts have been purchased and wrapped and put under the tree. The liquor store has been visited. The dip has been prepared

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-45936771107281148002010-12-22T11:15:00.000-06:002010-12-22T11:15:56.579-06:00

There is a house across the street from ours that a young man recently bought. He got it for a steal given its size/location because it was a short sale. Why was it a short sale? Not sure, but I'm going to guess it has something to do with the state that the previous owners left the house in when they left. It was, in short, a shit hole. I'm pretty sure the Weeble-shaped older couple who had

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-91081821499921838242010-12-17T11:54:00.000-06:002010-12-17T11:54:28.102-06:00

When I was little, there were several people I wanted to be when I grew up. First up, Elizabeth Montgomery. Or, more specifically, Samantha from Bewitched. Not only was she magic, but she was beautiful. And I dug her house. Now, her dorky bumbling husbands I didn't love. But her eccentric family? ADORED them. And speaking of her family, I was super jealous of Tabitha. Cute AND magic with

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-65675842741165372502010-12-16T17:11:00.005-06:002010-12-16T17:11:00.461-06:00

I don't know if it's the rapid passing of another year that's got me in a funk or what, but I am definitely in one. Let's investigate, shall we? Health: Well, my shingles are not as painful as they once were (thank goodness), but now they're just sort of hanging out, looking gruesome and feeling uncomfortable. Thank goodness it's not shorts season. My biggest concern now is passing this

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-28261403346547894782010-12-14T16:12:00.000-06:002010-12-14T16:12:43.444-06:00

Last Tuesday night, I started feeling yucky. I blamed it on what I'd eaten for dinner. Felt better Wednesday morning, but by Wednesday afternoon, super yucky. Achy and queasy. I blamed it on what I'd eaten for lunch. Went to bed early. Thursday morning, felt sort of normal again. Mid-morning, I started to feel like I was going to puke. Felt achy--like I was one gigantic bruise.Got on the

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-58200445597452363442010-12-10T14:56:00.000-06:002010-12-10T14:56:51.669-06:00

I ran to Academy during lunch to procure some roller skates for The Geej for Christmas. As I was standing there in the aisle looking at the skates, this woman was next to me, also looking at roller skates for girls. We struck up a conversation. She was buying two pair for her granddaughters. We both needed knee pads and elbow pads, but weren't too happy with the selection before us. Blah blah

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-82461550582026571962010-12-07T20:23:00.001-06:002010-12-07T20:24:39.886-06:00

I have posted The Geej's letters to Santa for the past couple of years due to the fact that a) they're kind of funny and b) they provide a nice time capsule of sorts--a glimpse into the things that she coveted or thought were important at that particular point in her childhood. This year's letter is just as telling as the last couple have been. It tells me that she doesn't want to screw around

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-9773430824273066262010-12-02T10:36:00.001-06:002010-12-02T10:45:43.341-06:00

In case you don't know me know me or can't tell from this blog, I have a weird sense of humor. The stupider and more ridiculous, the funnier to me. But I also really love intelligent, high-brow wit. So everything from fart jokes to Oscar Wilde, I find amusing. One of the reasons I love BH so much, is that he and I have very similar tastes in the absurd. We will laugh at stuff that, I assure you

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-38315255129145382862010-12-01T14:04:00.001-06:002010-12-01T14:23:59.410-06:00

I have a friend named Thelma Jane. I've known her since the early 90s, and she is one of my favorite people on the planet. The circumstances of our meeting are pretty funny. We were both hired at the same time to be the first Austin-based employees of a family-owned temporary employment company based out of San Antonio with a satellite office in Houston. They were a small company looking to

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-77206770858717963922010-11-30T11:47:00.002-06:002010-11-30T16:21:57.478-06:00

I woke up at 4:39am this morning. I needed to pee. So I got up and went to the bathroom and took my thyroid hormone, drank some water, and got back in bed. And then I just lay there, awake. My eyes were closed, but my mind was racing. Then I realized I was cold. Got up and shut the window in the bedroom (it was cracked) and got back in bed. And then I just lay there, awake. Mind going a million

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-28087977390335337682010-11-29T13:44:00.002-06:002010-11-29T14:27:14.922-06:00

Yesterday evening on the way back from getting The Geej from her overnighter with Dah, she asks me, "When we get home, can I call Daschel?" (You may recall from mentions in several previous posts that Daschel is The Geej's "boyfriend".) When I say yes, we probably can, she emphasizes how important it is that we do so because, "He's my boyfriend and I miss him and boyfriends and girlfriends talk

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-84361652124637694902010-11-28T21:40:00.000-06:002010-11-28T21:40:55.582-06:00

No seriously. Nothing. Woke up. Got dressed. Went to Bed Bath & Beyond to return a couple of things and to buy a new Brita pitcher. Came back home. Got BH and went and had brunch at Jack Allen's Kitchen. It was YUMMY! Came home and went to Lowe's with BH. Bought and A/C filter and some paint samples for the kitchen. Left to go to a movie with my friend Erin. That movie? Burlesque.

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-55279811016128025622010-11-27T20:38:00.000-06:002010-11-27T20:38:13.954-06:00

I love cooking for people I'm really good at cooking sides, but not the main course or the desserts I would rather buy really good desserts And cooking the main course is too stressful for me Timing is everything Prepping the night before is time well spent Digestive enzymes are helpful So is Ativan Even if you're also Tweeting and drinking wine while cutting up vegetables Few things annoy me

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-62317541629778886822010-11-26T22:43:00.000-06:002010-11-26T22:43:27.120-06:00

Yeah, I said it. I guess that means I'm un-American. Whatever. Anyhoo, I'm too tired and over liquored to get too original tonight, and yet must honor my NaBloPoMo commitment, and so I'm going to dig one about the joys of holiday shopping out of the archives. I promise it's a good one. With pictures and everything! So, for your consideration: "Worst. Retail. Experience. Ever."

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-47565344364583056082010-11-25T23:21:00.000-06:002010-11-25T23:21:01.530-06:00

WARNING: I am about to get all kinds of maudlin up in here, so if you'd rather not go there on this lovely holiday, then look away and come back tomorrow-ish. Thanksgiving, 2002 Setting: My dad's house, Longview, TX My dad is dying. He's got stomach cancer. My dad, who is one of the best cooks I've ever known and who has a passionate love affair with food, can no longer swallow solids. The

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-70198359732583411082010-11-24T11:29:00.000-06:002010-11-24T11:29:57.205-06:00

Yesterday evening, The Geej and I were sitting in traffic on our way back from our successful gravy boat/electric knife buying excursion to Bed, Bath & Beyond, and the following exchange took place: The Geej:   When can I go visit my old (Montessori) school and (her favorite teacher) Miss Kim? Karla May:   Well, honey, I don't know. Geej:   I really want to go. For a whole day. Like when MY

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-83582034174750293292010-11-23T22:18:00.000-06:002010-11-23T22:18:50.652-06:00

Now that the shopping is done*, I'm actually getting excited about all the cooking that's about to go down here at Chez Pine Curtain. BH's dad is, in fact, coming for a visit, so our dining room table (which seats six) will be full on Thanksgiving day. Here is Le Menu (with apologies to my vegetarian/vegan friends): A Greenberg smoked turkey, a.k.a. "The Holiday Aristocrat" Cornbread dressing (

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-1883041023680886492010-11-22T20:45:00.000-06:002010-11-22T20:45:00.525-06:00

Four years ago, I did this one word meme thing. I decided it might be kind of fun to do it again to see what's changed, and what hasn't. So here goes: Yourself: Complicated Your partner: Away Your hair: Mousy Your Mother: Happy Your Father: Missed Your Favorite Item: iPod Your dream last night: Rambling Your Favorite Drink: Water Your Dream Car: Acquired Your Dream Home: Bigger The Room You Are

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-62612231104981816592010-11-22T17:32:00.001-06:002010-11-22T17:32:04.997-06:00

I was reading an article for work called "A New Generation of Workers Is On the Way". It's all about what "Nexters" (a.k.a. Gen Y or Millennials) born between 1980 - 1994 expect from their workplace. At one point, Nexters are described in the following ways: They have minimal respect for authority and social rules of conduct Respond defensively to constructive criticism Expect immediate

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-17049492170772635102010-11-21T17:07:00.000-06:002010-11-21T17:07:15.557-06:00

If, in my younger years, I had written a list of things I never thought I'd be, "a step parent" would probably have been on it. Not because I ever had any real beef with my step parents, but because the reality of being on the other side of that fence was just not one I could envision for myself. But then I fell in love with a man with children, and the rest, as they say, is history. The thing is

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-39349388144176284372010-11-20T22:03:00.000-06:002010-11-20T22:03:12.004-06:00

Yeah, that's right: this is gonna be one of "those" posts. Part of the reason is that I'm way tired. Like the kind of tired that I imagine I would feel after running a marathon. But since I'll never actually run a marathon, maybe I'm full of shit. The other part of the reason is that almost everyone at my house is seriously sacked out right now--animals included--and I want to join the sleep

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-74104878027918169782010-11-19T15:03:00.000-06:002010-11-19T15:03:35.271-06:00

Yesterday, while stopped in traffic, the gentleman in the green Excursion (pictured above) caught my eye. The picture does not do him justice, as I assure you, he was straight-up CRAZY looking. Dressed in black and white camo outfit appropriate for freezing weather. It was in the upper 60s. Black gloves. HUGE Harry Carey glasses. Hair parted from the middle of the back of his head and combed

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-36064364599224158812010-11-19T12:49:00.000-06:002010-11-19T12:49:20.930-06:00

Whenever the holidays approach, it seems like everyone is taken off-guard by their arrival. The cries of, "Lordy be! It just CAN'T be Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Year's already!" are heard at every watercooler and grocery aisle meet up. But since the stores start stocking holiday items shortly after Labor Day, I just don't understand the perpetual surprise of their arrival. But I'm always one of

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8781730.post-20112056901788372762010-11-18T23:59:00.002-06:002010-11-19T11:36:50.272-06:00

Perhaps.

Karla Mayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16375350508647659249noreply@blogger.com0